首先我想向进修学院的同学问声好 So first I wanna say hi to extention school.
每天都有350名学生观看讲座 We have 350 students watching our lecture every day.
我想向他们问声好 So I wanna say hi to them.
我想特别邀请进修学院的同学 And actually I want to especially invite extention school
及在座的各位来听谦逊的Tal and everybody here to see our very modest Tal- right?-
他没告诉我们他上了《60分钟时事杂志》 但没关系 he didn't tell us he was on 60 Minutes,but that is OK.
但周六晚上 But Saturday night,
Tal将担任女子队 Tal is going to be the honerary basketball coach
荣誉篮球教练 for the women's team,
周六晚七点对抗Cornell大学队 which- the game against Cornell on Saturday at 7 o'clock,
那是本赛季最重要的比赛 which is the biggest game of the season...
六点吗？周六晚六点 本赛季最重要的比赛 Six? Six o'clock on Saturday. The biggest game of the season.
希望能见到在座的每一位 We actually wanna see everyone of you here
及进修学院的同学去观赛 and everybody at the extention school at the game.
进修学院的同学们 我有免费票给你们 Extention students,I'll have free tickets for you.
有一百张票 Well,most of you- a hundred of you.
以示敬意 So in honor of that,
我们有可敬的同学和可敬的球队 we have an honorary student and an honorary team which is,
著名的Kathy Delaney-Smith 获奖的 our very famous Kathy Delaney-Smith,award-winning,
国内最著名的教练 the most fabulous coach in a whole nation and...
女子篮球队也在这里 上来 our women's basketball team is here! Come on now!
这就是可敬的同学们 上来 她们害羞 These are our honorary students. There you go. They are shy.
来吧 上来 见见大家 Alright,so come! Come and see them!
我会和所有朋友和家人去观战 And actually I'll be there with all my friends and families.
Tal会在你们的手上签名 And Tal will sign your hand.
好 准备好了吗 好了 Alright! Ready guys? (One player: Yeah.)
这是最重要的比赛 This is the biggest game.
她们是去年的长青藤联盟冠军 These are the Ivy League Champs last year!
好 把礼物扔出去吧 扔出去吧 Alright. Give 'em a throw. Throw 'em out. Throw 'em out!
扔 快扔 快扔 Go! Go! Go! Let's go! Go! Go! Let's go! Hahaha.
好的 谢谢你们 Alright. Thank you.
谢谢 周六见 祝你们好运 谢谢 Thanks. I'll see you all on Saturday. Good luck. Thanks.
好 这不是我安排的 好啦 OK. I didn't plan this,but... (Tal blows a whistle.) Alright.
好的 身上还有别的东西吗？好 Alright,do I have anything else? Oh. OK.
谢谢你们 也感谢你们 Thank you .And thank you.
我们继续谈"感激" And we are going to continue talking about gratitude.
那么...上次课结束时我讲到我的榜样 So... Last time,I ended by talking about my role model-
我的一个典范 the person who to me exemplifies,
比任何人都重要 一个真正的积极者 more than anyone else what a true benefit finder is.
当我谈到我的祖母时 我说... And when I told about my grandmother,I told the...
我告诉你们她并不无视无益的东西 I told you how she wasn't ignoring what wasn't working,
她并不无视邪恶 坏的 生命中消极的东西 she wasn't ignoring the evil,the bad,the negative in her life.
但同时 她也拒绝无视积极的东西 However,the same time,she refused to ignore the positive.
换言之 她坚持保持现实 In other words,what she insisted on was staying real.
现实地生活 与周遭保持联系 Being real. Being connected to what was around her.
当周遭充满邪恶的坏的东西 And when it was evil and bad,
她与之保持联系 与此同时 she was connected to that and at the same time,
她也与好的东西保持联系 she was also connected to the good.
积极者不是盲目乐观的人 Benefit finder is not about being a detached Pollyanna.
区别很大 我们上次提出的问题 Far from it. The question we asked last time-
我想以"感激"结束今天的讲座 and I want to end the lecture today on gratitude
然后开始讲"改变" 第一是 before we move on to change- was: one,
为什么没有更多的积极者? why are not more people benefit finders?
为什么没有更多的人保持乐观? Why are more people not optimistic?
大家看到研究 人们活得更长 I mean,you saw the research. People live longer.
更快乐 更健康 更成功 They are happier,healthier,more successful.
为什么不是人人都是积极者？ Why isn't everyone a benefit finder?
为什么我们不都是乐观主义者？ Why aren't we all optimists?
如果它是有回报的 If it pays,
用终极货币形式 以幸福来回报 in both the ultimate currency- the currency of happiness
也用硬货币来 以成功来回报？ as well as in hard currency- success currency?
为什么没有更多的积极者？ Why are not more people benefit finders?
问题的答案 在很大程度上 And the answer to that was,to great extent,
是因为媒体的原故 because of the media.
媒体正在放大 聚焦 What we have in the media is magnifying,zooming in,
放大消极的东西 使其最大化 magnifying the negative,maximizing it,
由它占据整个屏幕 整个版面 having it take the entire screen,the entire page,
同时最小化积极的东西 while minimizing the positives.
在很多方面 媒体把我们变成消极者 And in many ways,the media makes fault finders out of us.
而我们需要反击 如何反击？ And we need to counter that. How do we counter that?
宏观层面上可以收看好的新闻频道 On the macro level,by having good news channels,for example.
微观层面上可以培育富有启发性的艺术 On the micro level,by having more inspiring art.
艺术在历史进程中改变了世界 Art throughout history has changed the world-
不论是在黑暗年代 whether it was during the dark ages,
在向文艺复兴过度的时期 at the transition to the Renaissance,
或者是在18和19世纪兴起的浪漫艺术家 whether it was during 18th and 19th century with Romantic artists
致力铺设通向自由之路 and paving the road to freedom,
亦或是上世纪三四十年代 whether it was in mid 1930s and 40s with the Renaissance
好莱坞的复兴 带给人们更多希望 in many ways of Hollywood,bringing more hope to people.
艺术扮演着非常重要的角色 So art plays a very important role,
希望能继续如此 and hopefully,will continue to do so.
然后我们谈到大的层面 宏观层面 So then we talked about the global level,the macro level.
在微观层面上 On the micro level,
我们谈到不要坐等坏事发生 we talked about not waiting for bad things to happen,
不要等悲剧 for tragedy,
或等外界有事发生 我们才知感激 for something external to happen for us to be grateful.
因为我们感激 就其定义而言 Because when we are grateful,by definition,
就是不以某事为理所当然 we don't take something for granted.
我们还分享了有关"感激"的文章及研究 And we shared the readings and the research on gratitude.
做这个修习的关键 The key,when doing it,when doing this exercise-
正如我所说 我每天都在做 and as I said,I do it every single day.
从1999年9月19日开始 I've done it since 19th of September,1999.
每一天 都进行信仰修习 Every single day. Religiously.
修习的关键 不将此修习视为理所当然 The key to doing it and not taking this exercise for granted
是一直保持新鲜感 is by maintaining freshness through-
如果你想每周做一次 if you want to do it once a week,
每周一次用心去做 it's better to do it once a week mindfully
比每天去做并将之视为理所当然要好 than doing it every day and taking it for granted.
好的 做过了 但最理想的是每天做 And OK check- did that. But ideally,you want to do it every day.
因为每天去做才能养成习惯 Because by doing it every day,that's when you form a habit.
那样才能改变思维 That's when you transform your thinking.
每天去做的话 关健是要有变化 And if you do it every day,the key is to vary,
每天思考不同的方向 to think about different aspect every day,
思考家人的不同方面 to think about different aspects of your family
如果你每天都给家人写信 if you write family every day.
一周讲述工作 下一周写家庭 To write about work one week. To write about home the next week.
每次都要用心 Maintaining mindfulness,
专注以前没有注意过的事情 focusing on things you didn't notice before,
发现新的特点 Ellen Langer如是说 creating novel distinctions,as Ellen Langer would say.
并在脑中想像 And visualize-
当你想到你的女或男朋友 so when you are thinking about your girlfriend or boyfriend,
书写感激之情时 在脑海中想像他们 and writting your gratitude,visualize them.
当你想到 When you are thinking about the meal
刚在食堂吃过的一顿美味可口的饭时 that you just had in your dinning hall which was delicious,
想它 在脑海中想像 让它变得尽可能真实 think about it. Visualize it. Make it as real as possible.
孩子就是这样思考 That's how children think.
所以孩子们每天都感觉新鲜 And that's why children have this freshness on the day to day-
他们不把任何东西视为理所当然 他们视生命为奇迹 they don't take anything for granted. They see life as a miracle.
爱默生曾经说过 You know,Emerson once said,
"如果星星每千年闪烁一次 "if the stars would shine once in a thousand years,
我们都会仰视赞美这个世界的美丽 we would all look up and praise the glory of this world.
但是因为它们每天都在闪烁 我们将之视为理所当然" But because they shine every day,we take them for granted."
在孩子眼中不存在理所当然 For children,that dosen't exist.
其中的一个原因 And part of the reason why it dosen't exist
是因为他们不会自动地概念性地思考 is that because they don't think automatically,conceptually.
他们的思维是感知感性的 They think more perceptually. Or sensually.
他们和现实保持联系 And they remain connected to the real.
通过在脑海中想像 我们就能做到 And we can do it simply by visualizing.
这项杰出研究完成于这里 This is a wonderful research done here,
就在William James大楼的八楼 William James Hall,8th floor.
做到"感激" 及实现即将谈到的"改变"的关键 The key to this,as to any change that we'll talk about-
我们会用超过两次讲座专门谈"改变" we are going to devote more than two lectures to change today
利用今天和下周整周 as well as the whole of next week-
关键是去做 亲力亲为 没有捷径 the key is to do it. To just do it. There are no short cuts.
不是因为你们听了有关"感激"的讲座 It's not because you've been through a lecture on gratitude
你们理解 and you understand,
你们真正理解积极者的含义 you really understand what a benefit finder means.
那不会... That dosen't...
仅仅理解不会让你成为积极者 That will not in and of itself make you a benefit finder.
你需要去做 需要去经历 You need to do it. You need to experience it.
只有这样 经过一段时间 And it's only through that,that over time,over time,
你才能开始越来越多地看到世界的积极方面 you'll begin to see more and more of the positive in the world
才能反击当下禁锢着 and counter the current schema
大多数人的思维方式 that most of us have literally been imprisoned by,
也就是消极者的思维 the fault finder schema.
William James在1890年 William James in 1890,
说过需要21天改变一个习惯 said that it takes about 21 days to change a habit.
可能有点过于乐观 It's probably a little bit optimistic.
可能需要更长时间 但不妨尝试21天 May take a little bit longer. But try for 21 days.
看会怎样 有些人 See what happens. You know there are some people.
我知道有些人已经在上次课后开始尝试 I know some of you have already started this after last class.
有些人立即见到益处 Some people see the benefits immediatly
当然益处可能会消失 and then you know the benefits may go away.
然后又在六个月后出现 And then they see the benefits again six months later.
但尝试一下 起码尝试21天或一个月 But try. Try it for at least 21 days. At least a month.
这也是你们下周的任务 Next week is going to be your task
作为每周任务的一部分 as part of your weekly assignment.
从今天开始 不要等 实现改变没有他法 But start today. Don't wait. No other way to change. Because
因为你所做的是一点点凿掉多余的石头 what you are doing is gradually chipping away the excess stone.
那多余的石头 那些强加给我们的限制 That excess stone,that limitation that has been put on us
例如通过周围的观念 by the schema all around us,
通过今早读到的新闻 大多数的交谈 by the news that you read this morning,by most conversations,
还有内心的审视 internal conversations that go on
以及外在的交谈等等 as well as the external conversations.
你所做的事 And what you are doing,
当你做这个简单的修习时 when you are doing this simple exercise,
它如此有效的原因 the reason why it works so well-
记往经常用心修习的人更快乐 remember people who do it regularly and mindfully are happier,
更健康 更宽容 更和蔼 更成功 healthier,or more generous and benevolent,more successful.
修习行之有效的原因是因为 The reason why it works is because
你所做的事是一凿一凿地 what you are doing is chisel by chisel,
削走多余的石头 chipping away the excess stone.
在我的书中 我谈到O'Hart Cummin In my book,I talked about O'Hart Cummin,
我的导师 在课堂上 my teacher and I've spoken to him...
也谈到过他几次 about him a few times in the class.
他曾经给我讲过一个故事 He told me a story once
在他不比你们大多少的时候 when he was not much older than most of you-
在他20来岁时 离开以色列 he was in his mid-20s,left Israel to...
他在欧洲生活了几年 最后住在荷兰 He was living in Europe for a few years and ended up in Holland.
过了一段时间后 他变得无家可归 And after a while,he found himself homeless,
住在一棵树下面 寒冷难耐 当时是冬天 literally living under a tree,cold- it was the winter,
身无分文 没有一分钱 也没有朋友 penniless- didn't have any money and without any friends.
悲惨极了 然而出于某种原因 他说 好吧 Absolutely miserable. And somehow for some reason,he said OK.
他抑郁了几周时间 然后他说 He was in this depression for a few weeks and he said,
"我不如试试" "well,let me try something."
拿出一张纸 在这张纸上 Took out a piece of paper and on this piece of paper,
写下让他感激的一切 simply wrote everything for which he was grateful.
他写下来的东西包括 他说 So the kind of things he wrote there,as he told me:
有贝多芬第五交响曲 他酷爱音乐 Beethoven's fifth- he loves music.
他写下在以色列的父母 He wrote his parents,who were in Israel.
他写下香草冰淇淋 至今仍是他的最爱 He wrote vanilla icecream,which until today is his favorite.
他想到家乡的朋友们 He thought about his friends back home.
所有这些事 他写了长长的一个名单 All the things- he made a long list of all the things
写下世上让他感激的事物 in the world for which he is grateful for.
他将那次经历视为他人生的转折点 And he credits this experience as the turning point in his life.
为什么? 因为他开始专注于别的事物 Why? Because he started to focus on something else.
不再对无奈可悲的处境耽耽于怀 Not just on the impossibilities,on the terrible,
而是专注于各种可能和美好的事物 but on the possibilities,the wonderful.
大家也来试试 Do the experi...
随便说一句 他现在55岁了 And by the way,he has this- he's now 55 years old.
仍随身携带这张纸 虽已褶皱 He has this piece of paper with him,crumbled but still there,
但仍装在他的钱包里 提醒他 in his wallet,reminding him that there is so much,
世上有太多美好的事物 so so many wonderful things in the world.
想想我们所过的生活 Just think about the kind of life that we are leading.
就在200年前 Back only 200 years ago,
谁有钱听最爱的音乐家的演奏 who could afford to listen to their favorite musicians,
欣赏最爱的演员的表演 最爱的戏剧? or to watch their favorite actors,favorite plays?
谁有钱做那些事? 只有王室 Who could affor to do it? Only royalty.
即使是他们也不能随心所欲 And even them- they were limited,
只能看在城里的音乐家演奏 in terms of which musician was in town
只能看逗留在城里的演员 or what players were in town.
今天这一切都在我们的指尖上 Today,we have literally the tip of our finger,
在我们的MP3和DVD播放机上 whether it's on our MP3 or our DVD player.
想像...想想我们的奢侈生活 Imagine... Just think about the luxury that we are living in.
国王和王后也望尘莫及 Kings and Queens that not lived that kind of luxury.
然而我们习惯了 我们适应了 However,we get used to it. We adapt.
有时这是件好事 And sometimes it's a good thing,
因为我们也适应困难的经历 because we also adapt to difficult experiences.
问题是我们如何学会 And the question is how do we learn in a sense to (12:47),
学会适应痛苦 meaning to adapt to the painful
但又不被伤害或变得容易受伤害? but not to remain impervious or to become impervious?
变得漠视我们所有的特权 To become indifferent to the privilege that we have.
如何才能保持感激之情?那就是要用心 How do we maintain the gratefulness? And it's by being mindful.
思考我们拥有的美好的东西 By thinking about those wonderful things that we have,
不论是在朋友身上 whether it's in a friend,
在一部我们想看的电影中 whether it's in a movie we want to watch,
或是过一会 whether it's in the lunch
食堂提供的午餐 we are going to have served to us in our house later.
感激修习如此有用的一个原因 The gratitude exercise- one of the reasons why it's so powerful-
因为我们所做的是共同创造一个现实 because what we are doing is we are cocreating a reality.
我们问得最多 Most of the questions that
或被问及最多的问题是"哪里不对了?" we ask or are asked of us is "what's wrong?",
"有什么需要改进的?""我的弱点是什么?" "what needs to be improved?","what are my weakness areas?"
这远远不是重要的问题 Important questions- not enough.
如果这些问题 If these are the only questions
是我们唯一提出或关心的 那么好的事物是不存在的 that we ask as far as we are concerned,good does not exist.
当我们问"我要感激什么?"时 And when we ask "what are my grateful for?",
即使每天只问一次 even it's just once a day,
这么做的本身创造了...祝你身体健康 that in and of itself creates- (A student sneezes)Bless you.
这么做的本身创造了一种新的现实 That in and of itself creates a new reality.
让我们开始看到曾经无视的东西 And we begin to see things that we haven't before.
我在做这样的修习时 So when I do this exercise
我已经修习了很长时间 and I have been doing it for a long time,
今天我才会注意到不做修习时 I notice things today that I wouldn't have noticed,
忽视的事物 我会说 had not been doing this. And I would say,
"今晚我要写一写这样东西 "oh,this is something I am going to write tonight.
它是那么美好" It's so beautiful."
开车兜风时 You know,when I go for a drive
看到笼罩在周日夜色中的Hampshires的群山 and see sunday night mountains in Hampshires,
晚上我要记下它 I'm going to write this down later.
没有修习我不会注意到它 It's... And I wouldn't have noticed it.
就我而言 这些东西是不存在 And as far as I was concerned,these things did not exist,
就像公交车上的小孩子不存在一样 just like the children on the bus did not exist,
当你没有问对问题时 while you are not asking also the right question.
显然表达感激也是重要的 It's important to express gratitude obviously
不仅仅对自己 也要对他人 not just to ourselves,but also to others.
这方面也有很多研究 A lot of research on that too.
这是...你们正在或已经读过 This was done by- you are reading or you have read- the paper
Seligman的有关向他人表达感激的论文 by Seligman talking about expressing gratitude to others,
可以是写信表达 拜访或致电 whether it's in the form of a letter or a visit or phone call.
表达感激的关键 And the key of expressing gratitude-
这不是一张简单的"感谢字条" this is not just a thank you note.
亲爱的妈妈 感谢你如此伟大 爱你的儿子 Dear Mom,thank you for being so great.Love,me.
那不只是简单的感谢字条 That's not just a thank you note.
它需要坐下来思考 It's sitting down and thinking,
"我能感激妈妈什么? "what can I be grateful for,for my mom?
她都为我做了什么? What has she done to me?
这些年来 她给与了我哪些?" What has she given me throughout these years?"
认真地去思考 认真思考 And really thinking about it. Or really thinking a thing,
"三年级的老师都为我做了什么?" "what this teacher from 3rd grade do for me?"
不是跟朋友聊天时说 Not just talking to my friends,
"三年级时我有个很棒的英语老师" "I have a wonderful English teacher in 3rd grade."
坐下来认真思考 我要感激什么? But sitting down and thinking. What am I grateful for?
她或他都为我做了什么 What did she or he do for me
对我的人生帮助良多 让我成为今天的我? that has contributed so much to my life,to who I am today?
我的室友总是尽其所能帮我 Or my roommate who always goes out of his or her way to help.
我真得很感激 要去静思 I am really grateful. And to think about it.
而不是在学年或学期未 Not just to,you know- at the end of year or of the summer,
说"你很好 棒极了" "oh you are great. You are terrific."
真正用心去思考这些人 Really think about what these people,
你生命中的重要的人 the important people in your life
为你做了什么 然后再表达出来 are doing for you and express it.
不要视之为理所当然 Don't take that for granted.
不要认为他们理应知道你心怀感激 Don't take for granted that they know how grateful you are.
"是的 妈妈当然知道 "Yeah,of course mom knows.
爸爸当然知道我感激他们 他们很棒" Of course dad knows that I'm grateful and they are terrific."
不要视之为理所当然 表达出来 Don't take it for granted. Express it.
写信 致电或面对面说都可以 Again,write it in a letter or by phone or in person.
当今最有效的一种干预形式 One of the most effective interventions out there today
是向他人表达感激之情 尤其是这种方法 is expressing gratitude to others especially this one:
写一封表达感激的信然后去拜访 writting a letter of gratitude and then visiting the person to
收信人 再把信读给他们听 whom you are writting and reading them the letter.
俗气? 同意 难为情? 有时是的 Cheesy? I agree. A little bit embarrassing? Sometimes.
你无法想像 You cannot imagine the kind of result
人们做感激拜访时获得的结果 that people get when doing just this gratitude visit.
但即使你不去拜访他们 But even if you don't visit them,
你觉得害羞 我建议去拜访 you do feel self-conscious doing it. I do recommend it.
如果你觉得害羞 But you feel self-conscious,
那就把信寄出去再打电话 send the letter,make that phone call.
致电前思考几分钟 And before,just think for a few minutes,
"我要说些什么?我到底感激什么?" "what am I going to say? What am I really grateful for?"
不论是对你的父母 Again,whether it's to your parents,
或朋友 whether it's to your friends,
或是一年级老师 去做吧 whether it's to your 1st grade teacher. Just do it.
或者是对你们的教练 表达感激时 Whether it's to your coach. The largest largest peak,boost,
是最让我们感到幸福的时候 spike in wellbeing when we are expressing gratitude to others.
想想吧 相当不可思议 Quite remarkable if you think about it.
进一步思考会发现它是双赢的 And if you think about it further,it is a win-win.
因为显然你从中得益 Because obviously you get the benefit-
研究已证明了这一点 表达感激时我们感觉很好 this is what the research shows. We feel good when we express it.
对方也会感觉很好 他们的获益良多 and the other person feels good too. They benefit a great deal.
于是你创造了一个双赢的局面 一个上升的螺旋 So you are creating a win-win and an upward spiral,because
因为对方也更可能向他人表达感激 that person is then more likely to express gratitude to others.
最好的方法是以身作则 The best way to lead it by an example:
成为你期许见到的改变 如甘地所说 be the change you want to see in the world,as Ghandi said.
想让他人充满感激? So you want people to be more grateful?
先以身作则表达感激 Express gratitude yourself.
他们才可能承接下去 They are more likely to then take it on
向他人表达感激 你不仅仅 and express gratitude to others. So not only you
在你和对方之间启动了一个上行螺旋 start an upward spiral between you and that person,
对方和他人之间可以承接上行 but also potentially between that person as well as others.
传递出去 传递出去 Paying it forward. Paying it forward.
这种干预的不利之处是 The downside of this intervention is
虽然它能让幸福感达到峰值 while it leads to a spike in well-being,
但一个月后 幸福感会消退 that spike usually goes away after about a month.
时间不同 可能是一周或三个月后 It varies: it can go away after a week or after three months.
但平均来说一个月后会消退 But the average it goes away after about a month.
幸福感的峰值 The spike to well-being.
保持这个峰值的关键就是经常去做 So the key you want to maintain the spike is to do it regularly.
每周做一次 两周做一次或一月做一次 Either once a week. Once a week,two weeks. Once a month. Do it.
一周打一次感激电话 把它变成仪式 You can do it one week a gratitude phone call and make it ritual.
下一周写信表达感激 The next week,a gratitude letter.
再下一周 感激拜访 以此类推 The week after that,a gratitude visit. Or something like that.
还是要有变化 形式的变化很有帮助 Again,variety. Variety really helps here.
但把它作为一种仪式经常去做 But do it regularly as a ritual.
下周谈"改变"时 And when we talk about change next week,
我们会谈到"仪式"的重要性 we'll talk about the importance of rituals.
因为在很多方面 Because in many ways,
那是唯一的真正持久的改变 that's the only change for real,lasting change.
有一项惊人的发现 Here's one of the surprising findings
是Sonja Lyubomirsky的发现 that Sonja Lyubomirsky found.
她发现如果我们写了那封信 What she found is that if we write that letter,
就算不寄出去 幸福感也能达到的峰值 we get the spike in wellbeing even if we don't send it.
寄出去当然会得到回应 Obviously if we send it and we get feedback,
峰值会更高 the spike is even higher.
但仅仅是书写 感受感激之情 敞开心扉 But just the act of writting it,of being grateful,being open,
这样做的本身也有助提升幸福感 下周 that in and of itself contributes to wellbeing. Next week,
你们的功课就是一封感激信 your response paper is going to be a letter of gratitude,
我们强烈建议你们去拜访对方 which we will highly recommend you visit the person
把信读给他们 或者最起码 and read it to them or,at the very least,
把信寄出去 如果你们相隔很远 send it if you are not close to them now physically.
但即使是写了信 But even if you just write it
却不好意思寄出去 and don't feel comfortable sending it,
那同样能提升你的幸福感 that in and of itself contributes to our wellbeing.
我想再深入谈谈 I want to go a little bit more in depth into
如何表达感激 再概况谈谈 how we express gratitude and in general,
如何应对痛苦和积极的情绪 how we deal with painful and positive emotions.
再次引用Sonja Lyubomirsky所做的研究 Once again,Sonja Lyubomirsky did research,
她邀请参与者谈论 while she invited participants to talk about
分享生活中最糟的经历 or to share the worst experiences of their lives
和最好的经历 and the best experiences of their lives.
她所做的是把他们分成四组 And what she did was divide them actually to four groups.
第一组 写出来 One group- write about it.
写出三方面 一是影响 也就是情感 二是行为 Write about the ABC,the affect- the emotion,the behavior-
即当时你做了什么 三是认知 即当时的想法 what you did then,and the cognition- what you thought then.
连续三天 每天一次 每次15分钟 Three times on three consecutive days for 15 minutes.
第一组只是写出来 First group just wrote about it.
第二组对着录音机说 The second group talked about it to a tape recorder
讲述最好的经历 另一组 about the same best experiences and another group,
讲述最糟的经历 worst experiences.
第三组 只是去想 Third group,just think about it-
连续三天 每天沉思15分钟 ruminate for 15 minutes also on three consecutive days.
她观察他们身体和心理的健康状况 What she looked at was physical and mental health.
她观察他们的健康程度 She looked at how healthy they were.
观察他们的身体 She looked at their physical...
他们认为自己有多健康 how they perceived themselves as healthy or not,
他们有多少种病症 how many symptoms they actually had.
她还观察他们的情绪 他们有多快乐 And she looked at their mood- how happy they were.
观察期是实验前和实验后的四周 Before the experiment and four weeks later,
经过三天 每天15分钟的干预后 after that three days,15 minutes each day intervention.
还有第四组 是一个对照组 There was also a fourth group,which was a control group.
她的发现如下 Here is what she found.
一共有三或四组 每组作两项研究 So basically you have three or four by two,
书写 谈论和沉思 writting,talking and thinking.
研究一是最糟的经历 研究二是最好的经历 Study one: worst experiences. Study two: best experiences.
书写的人 我来解释一下 Those who wrote- let me just explicate this.
书写最糟经历的人事实上感觉更好了 Those who wrote about the worst experiences actually felt better
身体上也更健康 and were physically healthier,
这是经过四周后与对照组相比的结果 compared to the control group four weeks later.
对着录音机说的那些人 还记得吗? Those who talked about it to a take recorder- remember?
谈论他们的感受 他们的经历 about what they felt,about what they've been through,
谈论当时的想法和现在的想法 about what they thought at the time while they are thinking now.
15分钟 连续三天 15 minutes,three days.
在谈论之后感觉更好了 Actually,felt better after talking about it.
那些想的人 Those who thought about it,
沉思的人 不去谈论 who ruminated about it,without talking,
不去书写 他们感觉更糟了 without writting about it,actually felt worse
一个月后身体状况也更糟 and were physically less healthier a month later.
研究二 The second study,
他们书写最快乐的经历 where they wrote about their happiest experiences,
我们看到相反的趋势 换言之 we see the opposite trend. In other words,
那些连续三天书写他们的经历 those who wrote about it on what they experience,
如何经历以及汲取的教训的人 how they experience it,what they learn from it on three days,
每次15分钟 for 15 minutes each time,
一个月后身体和心理上都感觉更糟 actually felt worse physically as well as mentally after a month.
那些谈论这三样的人 Those who talked about it also about the ABC-
即影响 行为和认知 the affect,the behavior,the cognition,
一个月后同样感觉更好但身体状况更差 also felt better and were less healthy a month later.
而那些只是想的人 Well those who just thought about it,
沉思他们的积极经历的人 ruminated about their positive experiences,
连续三天 每天15分钟想像它的人 imagined it on three consecutive days,15 minutes each day,
一个月后感觉更好更健康 actually felt better and were healthier a month later,
四周后的结果 于是她进行第三项研究去了解 four weeks later. So she ran the third study to understand-
这是很惊人的结果 出乎她的预料 this was a surprising result,was not what she expected.
于是她进行第三项研究去了解其中的机制 So she ran the third study to understand the mechanism-
这是怎么回事 为什么 what is going on here. Why is it that
当我们书写和谈论消极经历时 when we write and talk about negative experiences,
我们会感觉更好更健康? it makes us feel better and healthier?
增强我们的免疫系体? Strengthen our immune system?
但当我们思考或沉思时 Whereas when we just think about it,ruminate it,
发生什么事? what's going on here?
思考积极情感时却产生相反的结果 Whereas the exact opposite is the case with positive emotions.
她的发现是 And what she found was there was a distinction
分析和重现之间是有区别的 between analyzing and replaying.
当我们分析一次经历时 When we analyze an experience,
当我们理清它时 它真得有帮助 when we make sense of it,it helps. It actually helps.
痛苦的经历和消极的经历 Painful experiences and negative experiences,
所以心理治疗才有帮助 which is why therapy helps. And
心理治疗中最有帮助的 除了技术 what helps in therapy more than anything is less of technique,
除了心理治疗师的多年学习 less the years of study that the therapists had,
除了心理治疗师的经验 这些都很重要 less the experience that the therapists had. These things matter.
但不是最重要的 最重要的是他们的感同身受 But not that much. What matters most is are they empathic.
换言之 他们是不是好的聆听者? In other words,are they good listeners? so
当我们觉得可以谈论或者分析痛苦情绪时 when we feel like we can talk and analyze about painful emotion,
我们感觉更好 身体更健康 we feel better. We are physically healthier.
当我们只是坐下来 When we simply sit down
沉思痛苦的情绪却不去理清它时 and ruminate about painful emotions without making sense of it,
我们经常进入下行螺旋 we get very often into a downward spiral.
我们收窄压缩 感觉更悲哀 We narrow and constrict. We feel more sad.
进一步收窄压缩 We narrow and constrict even more.
还记得Barbara Fredrickson的研究吗？ Remember the Barbara Fredrickson's studies?
不断恶化 相反 虽然不清楚原因 And so on and so on. In contrast,we are not sure why.
当我们分析积极的经历时 真正地分析它 when we analyze a positive experience,really analyze it-
尝试理解为什么会发生等等 try to understand why it happened and so on.
连续这样做三天 So we do it for three consecutive days.
它确实没有帮助 我们不明白为什么 It actually dosen't help. We don't understand why.
也许是因为让我们回忆起 But maybe it's because it takes all the fun spontaneity
经历的快乐之处 from the experience.
但当我们只是沉思积极经历时 However when we just ruminate about the positive experience-
只是想也会提升我们的幸福感 just think about it,then it contributes to our well-being.
感激修习就是重播快乐经历 The gratitude exercise is about replaying the experience.
就是如此 换言之 It's exactly that. In other words,
就是说回想最快乐的日子 it's thinking about our happiest experiences of the day,
能自动导致积极的结果 which leads ultimately to positive outcome.
那么准许为人说的是什么? So what is it saying aobut the permission to be human?
有什么区别? How is it different?
因为准许为人也是为了 Because the permission to be human is also very much related
实现长期的快乐和健康 to being happier and healthier in the long term.
区别是这样的 准许为人 Well here's the difference: with the permission to be human,
我们准许自己感受各种情绪 we give ourselves the permission to experience the emotions
只要有必要 for as long as necessary.
失去亲人时 我们准许自己感受情绪的时间 If we just lost someone,it would be much longer
远比考试失利的时间要长 than if we just didn't perform so well in the test. But
但我们准许自己感受经历 we give ourselves the permission to experience the experience.
然后我们自问 And then we ask ourselves,
"现在最有效的行动是什么?" "so what would be the most effective way to act now?"
最有效的行动之一 And one fo the most effective way to act
是去分享那次经历 would be to share that experience.
最有效的行动之一 One fo the most effective way to act
是写日记 接受每天的行为 would be to just write in our journal. Daily active acceptance.
不要苦苦沉思痛苦的情绪 Not just ruminating and staying there with this painful emotion.
我思考的一件事 Now one of the things I thought about it
也与祖母的经历有关 also in the context of my grandmother's experience
为什么会那样 一会我们会谈到PTSD is why is it that- we'll talk about PTSD in a few minutes-
为什么会那样 why is it that
从越南回国的很多美国人 so many people in the United States coming back from Vietnam
30%的越战老兵都患有严重创伤后遗症 30% of Vietnam vets experience post traumatic stress disorder.
那影响了他们整个人生 It affected their entire lives.
但经历过大屠杀的人 Whereas people who have been through the holocaust,
同样是可怕的经历 经常是更可怕的经历 no less terrible experiences,very often,much worse experiences,
经历过大屠杀的人 就百分比来说 people who have been through the holocaust,percentage wise-
患有PTSD的要少得多 there are far less people who have PTSD-
严重创伤后遗症 为什么会有这种区别? post traumatic stress disorder. Why this difference?
我知道在以色列 50%的老年人 I mean,you know in Israel,50% of the older population-
在我出生时 50%的人口都是大屠杀幸存者 when I was born,50% of the population were holocaust survivers.
我没看到有很多严重创伤后遗症患者 I didn't see much post traumatic stress disorder there.
但30%的越战老兵都有PTSD Whereas again,30% of Vietnam vets have PTSD.
现在陪审团正在调查 Now the jury is still out to see
二次伊战老兵有多少患PTSD how many of the second Iraq war will come back with PTSD,
数字一定也很惊人 but the number is going to be staggering too.
为什么? 为什么有这样的区别? Why? What's the difference?
我认为这就是解释 And I think this explains the difference.
越战是遭到反对的战争 You see,Vietnam is not a popular war.
很多老兵回到家 Many of the vets who came back to their home,
回到家乡后 不会公开谈论它 to their country didn't talk about it openly.
他们把经历藏在心里 They kept it inside them.
他们所做的事情是 他们就在这里 And what they did was they were- right here-
他们反复回忆最可怕的经历 thinking about some of the worst experiences,
在脑海中反复播放 replaying it in their minds over and over and over again.
结果情况越来越糟 And the situation just worse and worse and worse.
相反 In contrast,people coming from,
同样可怕的大屠杀的幸存者 again no less terrible experiences in the holocaust.
他们回到自己的村子 They came back to their village.
回到自己的国家 They came back to their country.
他们去以色列 在那里做什么? They came to Israel and what did they do there?
他们谈论 They talked about it.
谈论他们的经历 多数人并非所有人 They talked about their experiences- most of them,not all-
多数人会和朋友谈论他们的经历 most of them talked about their experiences with their friends,
和家人 不停地谈论 with their family constantly talked about it.
他们在这里 随着时间推移 They were here. And over time,
这帮助他们继续生活下去 it helped them move on and continue.
这项研究给出的最好建议 你们都知道 So the best advice from this study,you know that,
正如我所说 as I told you,
这门课你们学不到太多新东西 I am not going to teach you much new in this course.
只想提醒你们 互助组的帮助有多大 Just want to remind you how helpful it is to have support group.
与朋友 家人分享的帮助很大 How helpful it is to share with friends,with family,
和心理治疗师聊天 写日记 书写 with a therapist,with a journal,in writting-
下周我们会谈到日记的作用 we'll talk about journalling next week-
两者对积极和消极经历 you know the most effective interventions both for positive
都是最有效的干预形式 as well as negative experiences-
只是以不同的形式书写 only we are writting in different way:
一种是分析 另一种是简单的重播 one we analyze; the other,we simply replay.
表达感激不应该等到感恩节 Being grateful shouldn't wait for Thanksgiving.
我们不应该只等每年一次 在11月的那天 We shouldn't wait just once a year,that November date,
去表达感激之情 when we express gratitude,
坐在桌旁轮流说感激什么 when we go around the table and say what we are grateful for.
它应该是一个习惯 首先因为它行之效 有帮助 It should be a habit. A,because it works,it helps.
其次因为它是道德的 And B,because it's moral.
这点很重要 我会贯穿始终强调 This gets to a point that I'll repeat throughout the course,
道德也是实际的 where the moral is also the practical.
而实际在多数情况下 也是讲道德的 The practical,in most cases,is also the moral.
两者密不可分 David Steindl-Rast They go hand in hand. David Steindl-Rast,
上次课我提到的那本书"我们生活在一个给与的世界 the book that I mentioned last time: "We live in a 'given" world.
带来满足的是感激之情 What brings fulfillment is gratefulness,
心灵对此给与人生的简单回应 the simple response of our heart
就是圆满" to this given life in all its fullness.”
就像一个孩子 诗人Galway Kinnel写道 Again,just like a child. The poet,Galway Kinnel:
"感激地活着和死去 若无其他美德" "To live and die in gratefulness,if in no other virtue."
Cicero写道"感激不仅是最大的美德 Cicero: "Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues,
也是其他美德的发源" 为什么是其他美德的发源? but the parent of all others". Why is it parent of all others?
我经常想起这句最爱的话 但是为什么? I thought about this sentence a lot which I love,but why?
想想吧 如果我们不知感激 Because if you think about it,if we are not grateful,
我们就会将事情视作理所当然 then we take things for granted.
如果我们不知感激生命中美好的事物 If we are not grateful for the good things in our lives,
认为它们理所当然 那就会对它们视而不见 things are taken for granted. And then we are blind to them.
对我们来说 它们是不存在的 Then as far as we are concerned,they do not exist.
美德为什么是高尚的? 是它的好 Now what makes virtue virtuous? It's the good.
如果世上没有好 And if there is no good in our world,
那么美德将不再高尚 then that takes away the virtue from being virtuous.
所以我认为... That is why I think...
Cicero所谓的 what Cicero was talking about when he meant
"它是所有美德的发源"的含义 "it is the parent of all virtues".
另一个重要的积极者是雷德克利夫学院学生 Another concernment benefit finder is the Radcliff student,
曾经的雷德克利夫学院学生 Helen Keller or was a Radcliff student,Helen Keller.
Helen Keller Helen Keller,quite literally,
能让我们睁开双眼感激周遭的事物 open our eyes and get us appreciate what is all around us.
她在精彩的自传中讲了一个故事 She tells us a story in her wonderful autobiography
关于一个曾去剑桥看望她的朋友 about a friend who came to visit her once in Cambridge.
当时还有很多树林 There were many more woods at the time.
那位朋友在树林里散步 And the friend walked around the woods
朋友回来时 Helen Keller问她 and when her friend came back,Helen Keller asked her,
"你看到了什么? 留意到什么?" "so what did you see? What did you note?",
她的朋友回答说"没什么特别的" to which her friend responded,"well,nothing in particular."
Helen Keller在自传中 And Helen Keller responds to that
对"没什么特别的"作出回应 我来念念 "nothing in particular" in her autobiography. Let me read.
"我奇怪怎么可能在树林里 “I wondered how it was possible to walk for an hour
走了一小时后 却什么都没看到 through the woods and see nothing of note.
我虽看不到却发现许多东西 I who cannot see find hundreds of things:
精美对称的叶子 the delicate symmetry of a leaf,
银色白桦的光滑树皮 the smooth skin of a silver birch,
松树粗糙的树皮 the rough,shaggy bark of a pine.
我一个瞎子也能给看得见的人一个提示 I who am blind can give one hint to those who see:
像明天就会瞎掉那样用你们的眼睛 use your eyes as if tomorrow you will have been stricken blind.
听声音的乐曲 鸟的鸣唱 Hear the music of voices,the songs of a bird,
一个管弦乐队的强劲弦律 the mighty strains of an orchestra
仿佛明天你会突然聋掉 as if you would be stricken deaf tomorrow.
像明天就会失去触觉那样触摸每样东西 Touch each object as if tomorrow your tactile sense would fail.
闻花朵的香气 品尝每一口的气味 Smell the perfume of flowers,taste with relish each morsel,
仿佛明天你将永远失去味觉和嗅觉 as if tomorrow you could never taste or smell again.
充分利用每一种感官 Make the most of every sense.
每一面的美好 愉悦和美丽 Glory in all the facets and pleasures and beauty
这世界向你展现" which the world reveals to you."
每天两次花一分钟时间留意周遭的一切 Take a minute twice a day to focus on what is going on around you
花一分钟的时间 Take a minute when...
在上课的路上看看美丽的草地 on your way to class to look at the beautiful grass,
青翠的树 美丽的雪 the beautiful trees,the beautiful snow.
晚上用一分钟去回忆 Take a minute in the evening to reflect
回想你度过的一天 and think about the day you had,
写下让你心怀感激的事物 and to write down the things for which you are grateful.
今天午餐时 Today over lunch,
略比平时吃得慢些去品尝 just by a little bit slower than you do normally and taste,
体验品尝的滋味 experience the taste.
因为我们所吃的食物是种特权 Because it is a privilege to have the food that we have.
朋友是我们的特权 It is a privilege to have the friends that we have.
家人是我们的特权 the family that we have.
我们不应视特权为理所当然 And we shouldn't take that privilege for granted.
因为我们不知欣赏的就会贬值 Because what we don't appreciate unfortunately depreciates.
我们不需要经历一次威胁 一出悲剧 We don't need to wait for a threat,for a tragedy,
才去感激周遭和内心感受的一切 for us to appreciate what's all around us and within us.
时刻提醒我的 我的周围环境 What reminds me constantly,my surrounding,
时刻在我眼前提醒我的 the reminder that I have always in front of my eyes,
是我家人的一张照片 is a picture of my family and particularly,
特别是中间的祖母 of my grandmother in the middle.
祖父看到她弯腰走进来 And here's my grandfather who saw her coming in stooped,
病倦不堪 他把她揽在怀中 我办公室里放着这张照片 ill and took her into his arms. I have this picture in my office.
经常看它来提醒自己 Looked at it all the time to remind me.
我本可以现在给你们讲这个故事 I would have told you the story now
原本安排在讲座最后 which comes at the end of the lecture.
但我知道讲完故事 我会心力憔悴 But I know when I tell the story,it drains me so much.
我将无法继续讲座 I don't think I would be able to go on.
所以我会在讲座最后讲这个故事 So I told you at the end of the lecture last time.
但这是给了我一个提醒 But this is my reminder.
它激励我创造一个积极的环境 This is what primes me,creating a positive environment-
激励提醒我要作一个积极者 primes me and reminds me to be a benefit finder.
接下来我想做的是 So here is what I want to do now.
现在我想占用一点时间 What I want to do now is take a time in.
本学期第一次占用时间 不会是最后一次 The first time in of the semester,not the last one.
占用一点时间让你们有机会审视自己 Time in when you have a chance to look inside yourself,
去反省 to reflect.
分组时也有机会 You'll have opportunity in sections as well.
我想现在教室里做 I want to do it now in this room.
我要你们用几分钟时间回想 I want you to take just a couple of minutes to think about
在脑子里记下来你所感激的事物 and write down mindfully the things for which you are grateful.
生命中美好的事物 给你们两分钟时间 The wonderful things in your life. So take two minutes to do it.
计时 (Time in)
好 希望大家课后能继续 Ok. It would be great if you continue this later on as well.
现在我想做另一件事 But I want to do something else now.
有点让人难堪的事情 我先表示歉意 Something slightly embarrassing. My apologies in advance.
但我想让大家现在 But what I'd like you to do now
和你旁边的同学分享 is share with the person next to you some...
不必分享所有事 You don't need to share everything.
可以隐去一些事情 And you can have some beeps in middle
你想有保留 完全可以 if you want to have censorship. That's fine.
用几分钟时间分享一下 But just take couple of minutes to share with one another,
和身边的同学 如果是三个人 with the person next to you or if there are three of you,
简单快速地分享一下 just share quickly.
我给你们两分钟时间 I am just going to give you two minutes for that.
分享你们感激的事物 The things for which you are grateful.
可以详细说一件事也可以读你列下的清单 You can elaborate on one thing or you can read the list.
（学生在分享） (Students talking)
再给你们30秒 30秒收尾 Take 30 secondes more. 30 secondes more to finish up.
好了 好了 大家可以课后继续 OK. OK. You... You can continue later.
我建议大家课后继续 I recommend you continue later.
很简单的干预却获益良多 Very simple intervention that goes a long way.
只要我们能专注于积极的方面 If we just learn to focus on the positive,
就能同共创造更多积极的现实 现在我想做的是 we co-create the more positive reality. What I want to do now
在开始关于"改变"的讲座之前 before moving on to the next lecture on change.
我想就期末报告说几句 I want to say a few words about the final project.
期末报告 Remember the idea of the final project
你们将要做的 is basically a presentation anywhere between 20 to 30 minutes
是一次时间在20到30分钟的报告 that you will create.
进修学院的同学 This is both for the extention school
和在校生都要做 as well as for the college students.
20到30分钟的报告 而且要交上来 20-30 minute presentation that you will hand in as,
积极心理学中的任何主题都可以 or about any topic within positive psychology.
随便说一句 And by the way,
也可以是用积极心理学干预 that could also be positive psychological interventions
治疗抑郁和焦虑 可以是关于"感激"的 for depression or anxiety. It could be about gratitude.
可以是关于身心联系 It could be the mind body connection.
可以是关于灵性和宗教 It could be about spirituality and religion.
可以是关于自尊 It could be about self-esteem.
我敦促大家去做的 What I would urge you to do
是找到对自身最有具意义的 is find the most personally meaningful topic
你想研究的主题 that you want to research.
记往最私人的也是最普遍的 Remember what is the most personal is also most general.
如果你对灵性问题很感兴趣很狂热 So if you are very much interested,passionate in spirituality,
就写有关灵性的报告 do that.
如果你想更好地理解 If you really want to understand more
更好地应用于人生 and be able to apply to your life more,
把积极心理学干预用于解决 我不知道 positive psychological interventions for,I don't know,
公开演讲焦虑症或其他问题 都可以 public speaking anxiety or whatever it is,do it on that.
报告内容对个人问题涉及的越多 The more personal you get in that,in that paper,
你从中得到的也越多 the more you'll get out of it.
你们要把书面报告交上来 You'll hand it in as a written text.
20到30分钟的报告内容 大约要写10到15页 20 to 30 minutes is about 10 to 15 pages of texts
这是你们最终要交上来的 and this is what you'll ultimately hand in.
既要交书面报告也要交幻灯片 You'll give both a written text as well as slides.
我们不会因你的幻灯片 We are not going to grade for how beautiful
有多漂亮多精彩而打分 and how amazing your powerpoints...
但我们希望你们能提交幻灯片 But we do want you to hand in slides
那将作为你们报告的大纲 that will be the outline for your talk.
打分的唯一部分 Now the only part of this that will be actually graded
是你最后提交的东西 也就是你的报告的文稿 is what you hand in at the end,meaning the text of your lecture.
但是除此 However,in addition to that,
幻灯片是必选项 the powerpoint will be graded pass/fail,
就是说必须做幻灯片 meaning you have to do it.
但幻灯片不会参与打分 but you are not going to be graded for it,
是给小组成员作的报告时用的 is to give the presentation to other people from your section.
进修学院的同学 Those of you in extention school
将对社区的其他人作报告 will give to other people in your community.
这样做是为了传递出去 The idea here is paying it forward.
找到一个主题然后传递出去 Getting an idea and doing it.
我的演讲生涯就是这样开始的 That's how I actually started my speaking career.
我自己有个感兴趣的主题 I had a topic that I was personally interested
我给壁球队作了演讲 and I gave it to the squash team.
我跟和我很亲近的人讲 I talked about it. Just to people close to me.
我有了一个主题 最后发展成演讲 And I had a topic and then that evolved over time.
我们希望那些没有经历的同学 So we want you,for those of you who haven't had the experience
首先去综合 is to first of all synthesize material
你感兴趣的主题的资料 in the topic that you care about,
那些能改变你人生的东西 that you think will make a difference in your life;
然后再传递出去 and second to be able to pay it forward.
必须有参考书目 It has to have reference to research.
这不只是个人故事或自传 This is not just a personal story or an autobiography.
必须有参考书目 It has to have reference to research. In addition to,
当然可以加上能突出你的论点的故事 of course stories that you think capture the point.
最有效率的沟通方法 Probabaly the most effective way of communicating an idea
大概就是通过故事 is through stories.
十年后 你们也许不会记得 You know,you'll probably not remember ten years from now,
关于自我效能的研究 但你很可能 the research on self-efficacy. But you are much more likely
记得Roger Bannister的故事 to remember the story of Roger Bannister.
人们记得故事 与故事产生联系 So people remember stories. They connect to stories.
但与此同时 这是一份学术报告 But at the same time,this is an academic paper.
我们希望即有学术性又通俗易懂 We want to brige the Ivory tower and the Main Street.
所以要有参考书目 So have references to research.
可以选择以下手段 And these are the things that would be optionally:
可以截取电影片段 如果报告中有电影片段 you can have film clips- if you have a film clip in it,
如果是十分钟的电影片段 it's a 10 minute film clip,
它不会被计入报告时间 it dosen't count as part of the 10 to 30 minutes.
尤其是当你截取20分钟电影片段时 Especially if you have 20 minute film clip
除非你准备来次讲座 那也可以 unless you are giving a lecture,which is fine.
要包括练习 And include exercise.
如果这是个工作坊 你会做哪些练习? So if this is a workshop,what exercise would you do?
你会让 Would you have,
参与者相互表达感激吗? you know participants express gratitude to one another?
你会让他们写篇日记吗? Would you have them writting a journal?
你会让他们在课后出去锻炼身体吗？ Would you have them go out and exercise physically later?
所以还要包括练习 下面是提交日期 So include exercises as well. Here are the dates.
这是...你们的最后期限是 So this is em... These are your deadlines,
或者说你们报告的生命线是 or rather,your lifelines in this project.
3月20日 在春假之前 March 20th,just before spring break,
你们只需要告知助教你们的主题 all you need to do is let your TF know your topic.
一个字 一句话 "感激"也好 "灵性"也好 One word,one sentence- it's gratitude. It's spirituality.
是"身与心" 身体练习 都可以 It's mind-body. Specifically physical exercise.
通知他们一声 Just let them know.
一两周后 你们可以改主意 Now you may change that a week later or two weeks later.
我们只希望你们开始思考 But we just want you to start honing and thinking about
你最想做的主题 那是3月20日的任务 what your likely topic will be. So that's March 20.
4月7日 让你们享受几天春假 April 7- give you some time after spring break,
放假时不必操心课业 so you don't have to work on it over spring break,
虽然我们希望你们能抽时间思考 though we hope you'll at least think about it
放假期间阅读些材料 and read some stuff over spring break.
4月7日交一页大纲 你的主题的草稿 April 7: one page outline. A draft of your topic.
这个也不计入分数 Again,this is not graded.
只是为你们自己 确认是否通过 This is just for you,meaning pass/fail.
所以必须交上来 只是为了你们自己 So you have to hand it in. Just for you.
好让你们和助教商量 5月3日之前 Then you can talk to your teaching fellow about it. By May 3,
向至少三到四位同学作一次报告 give the presentation to at least three or four classmates.
如果你是进修学院学生 就给别人讲一次 If you are in extention school,give it to other people.
征求他们提供意见 And ask them for feedback.
得到反馈意见 最好是书面的 And you'll get feedback- ideally,written feedback.
到时我们会谈到具体的过程 We'll talk to you about the process later on when the time comes.
这个也不计入分数 只是为了你们自己 Again,this is not graded. It's for you.
既为你也为参与者 It's for you as well as for the participants,
因为你们在传递 because you are paying it forward.
可以是一份草稿 就是一份草稿 It can be a rough draft. It is a rough draft.
我也会给出意见 And I'll give you feedback and say,
"我觉得还缺一个故事 "you know,what I thought was missing is maybe an extra story
我感觉你的研究资料不足" or I felt like you were not grouded enough in research."
或者"再加入更多活力" Or,you know,"introduce a little bit more energy."
不论是什么 向听众获取意见来帮助你 Or whatever it is. Get feedback from them to help you.
再过一周就是期末报告的截止日 And then the week later,the final project will be due.
有什么问题吗? 如果你有问题 Any questions about this? If you have a question,
别人也可能有同样的问题 probbably others have the same questions.
关于期末报告有任何问题吗? So any questions about the final project?
好的 想一想 请说 Ok. Think about it. Yes. Question.
不 不是分组进行 其实你们会...好的 No,it's not in section. You will actually... Ok.
问题是你们在哪里作报告 So the question is where do you make the presentation.
你们会被分成组 You'll have to get together with your group,
和另外三到四个人 可能是三人一组 the other three or four,probably be three.
然后相互作报告 And give each other the presentation.
想用幻灯片 If you want to do it with powerpoints
做完整的报告 非常好 and the whole thing,that's perfectly fine.
只想读或说出来 If you just want to read it or speak it,
也完全没有问题 that's perfectly fine too.
可以选择对你最有帮助的方式 Your choice is whatever you think would be most helpful to you.
再强调一次 这个设计是为了你们自己 Again,this project is for you.
是为了你们自己 希望那些 It's for you and for others hopefully
听你报告的人也能从中受益 who will benefit from hearing what you have to say.
做过这个设计的学生们 Students who have done it-
过去两年我们一直有这么做 we've already done it for the last two years.
我教的第一年只提交了普通报告 The first year I taught it- we just had a regular paper.
学生们非常喜欢这个过程 And the students enjoy this process so much more
从中获益良多 他们保留了这种作法 and get so much more out of it and it stays with them.
因为你可以用这个方式 Because it's something you can take,again,
在修完这门课后继续向外传递 还有问题吗? 是的 pay forward also when you are done here. Other questions? Yes.
塔尔宾夏哈尔博士 Dr. Tal Ben-Shahar:
是的 很好的问题 Yes. Good question.
是否要收窄到一个主题 So are you supposed to narrow down a topic
而不是笼统的人生灵性体验? as opposed to being very general life spirituality?
这完全看你们 你可以先概况 Up to you. Up to you. You can give an overview and then,
在报告结束时再说 at the end of your presentation,say,you know,
有一些很有趣的研究 these are some of the interesting studies,
如果你们想了解更多 but if you want more information,you know,
可以去那里找找 也可以做些特别的报告 you can look there. Or you can do something very particular.
比如去教堂的好处 So the benefit of church going.
或有氧锻炼的好处 Or the benefit of aerobic exercise.
可以专注于一个主题也可以更笼统 It can be very specific or much more...
比如有氧锻炼的心理益处 Or the benefit,psychological benefit of Arabic exercise.
即可以专注于一个主题也可以很概括 So it can be very specific or very general.
由你们决定 只要你觉得更感兴趣 Up to you. Whatever you think would be more interesting to you.
我们经常会发现 And what often happens when we found this is that
当你们着手准备讲座 查资料 once you get into the literature,you are going through info-
阅读很多研究时 那时你们才会明白 you'll read a lot of studies there. That's when you understand,
"仅就这个问题 我就有很多资料 "OK,I have so much material on just this specific point
我准备专注这里" I am going to focus here."
或者我很想概述整个主题 Or I really want an overview of this whole topic.
然后在后面的报告中 And then in later presentations,
或者我会在以后专注这个主题编一堂课 or I'll create a whole class just based on this topic later on.
或者网站 很多学生 Or website. There are actually many students
根据他们的报告开设了网站 who created websites based on their projects.
那里还有人举手 或者你只想问候一下? There was another hand up there. Or were you just saying hi?
是的 他们听不到你说的话 Hi. Yes. They can't hear you.
世界各地的进修学院的学生 For extention students all over the world,
你们可以在任何地方选两三个人 you are going to pick two or three people anywhere,
家人 朋友 family,friends,
任何人都可以 但要是你的"美丽敌人" whoever it is but people who will be "beautiful enemies" to you,
他们会给你真实的意见 who will give you real feedback.
因为他们关心你 好了 还有吗? Because they care about you. Good. Alright. No one else?
好的 还有问题的 Alright,if you have further questions,
可以问你们的助教或问我 ask your TF or ask me.
祝你身体健康 (A student sneezes.) Bless you.
改变 可以说 Change. In many ways,
整门课都在讲改变 we've been talking about change the whole class.
这门课就是关于"改变" 我在第一堂课就说 This class is about change,as I said on the first class,
如果我认为人不能改变 我就不会上这门课 I wouldn't be teaching it if I didn't think people could change.
我说到改变时 我说的是不同的层次 And when I talk change,I am talking about different levels.
可以是培养一个习惯 Whether the change in terms of introducing a habit:
我想每周锻炼三次 为什么？ I want to start exercising for three times a week. Why?
因为几周后 你们会看到 Because as you'll see from a few weeks from now,
每周锻炼三次的效果 exercising three times a week has the same effect
和很多有效的心理药物相同 as some of our most powerful psychiatric drugs.
或者你想培养的习惯是 Or let's say habit you want to introduce is you know,
我希望人生的精神层面更丰富 I want to introduce spirituality to my life.
改变也可以是"我想更快乐" Or change could be "I want to be happier".
我希望不要那么焦虑 I want to experience less anxiety.
一般的焦虑或者特定的焦虑 例如考前 General anxiety or specific anxiety,before tests.
不论你希望生活有什么样的改变 Whatever the change you want to introduce to in your life,
总有一定的模式和方法行之有效 there are certain patterns,certain approaches that work,
另一些方法行之无效 certain approaches that don't work.
未来两堂课我们要做的是 What we are going to do next two classes,
两堂半课 是区分哪些行之有效 two and a half classes is differentiate what works
哪些行之无效 以便让你们将之应用于生活 and what dosen't so that you can apply it to your life.
首先 关于改变 我们谈过很多 So first of all,we've talked a lot about change.
让我们来回顾一下曾经讨论过的问题 Let's recap some of the things that we discussed.
首先 在第二堂课上 我们已经提到 First of all,on the second class we already mentioned this,
改变很难 that change is hard.
很多研究都证明了改变有多难 And there are a lot of studies to show how hard change is.
双胞胎研究 还记得结论吗 The twin research. Remember the conclusion.
尝试改变快乐水平 Try and change your happiness is
如同试图改变身高一样徒劳 as difficult and futile as trying to change your height.
虽然他们后来也说 Now even though they went back on their word and they said
"不一定是不可能和徒劳的" "well it's not really impossible and futile",
但他们的研究证明了很难做到 still what they did show in their studies is that it is very hard
双胞胎研究 快乐是一种随机现象 The twin studies. Happiness is a stochastic phenomenon.
还有Daniel Gilbert的关于有效预测的研究 Then Daniel Gilbert's work on affective forecasting.
在哈佛得到终身职位 或考入哈佛后 Yeah we experience it an up after we get tenure
我们的幸福感上升 当我们遭到拒绝时 or after we get into Harvard,and we experience a down
经历下行 when we are rejected by whatever it is. But
但很快我们又恢复到幸福感的基准线上 then very quickly we go back up to our base level of wellbeing.
人生的多数时候 And most of our life
幸福感都是在基准线上下波动 looks like this around this straight base level.
获得上升抛物线很难 It's very difficult to get an upward trajectory.
通过去面对可能做到 但很难 It's possible through coping for example,but it's difficult.
剑桥-萨默维尔研究表明 The Cambridge-Somerville study-
五年的干预 最终导致消极改变 5 year intervention that ultimately led to negative change,
即使有最好的心理学家 心理治疗师 whether there's more alcoholism among the people
社工和各种计划进行干预 who did go through that intervention with bright in the best.
实验人群中还是有更多人酗酒 Psychologists,psychiatrists,social workers,programs.
我们知道改变很难 So we know change is hard,
不论是个人还是社会层面 whether it's on the individual level or on the society level.
然而我们也知道改变是可能的 However,we also know the change is possible.
我们知道很多人争辩说 We know that many of the people who argue that change
改变是不可能的 他们犯了普遍性的错误 is not possible are making the error of the average,
只看平均分而不看例外情况 looking at the average score as opposed to outlayers,
不看那些实现改变的人 as opposed to people who have introduced change.
当我们研究改变时 是例外证明了改变是可能的 And when we study change,it's the exception that proves the rule
如果改变是可能的 有些人实现了改变 So if change is possible and some people have been able to change
或者是通过治疗 读一本书 whether it's through therapy,whether it's by reading a book,
参加学习 whether it's being a part of the class,
或者是通过交谈 whether it's through conversation-
有时只需要一句话 sometimes it's a single sentence
就能改变他们的整个人生 that makes a difference to their entire life,
他们是例外 they are the exceptions. But
但问题不再是改变是否可能 the questions are no longer whether or not change is possible.
问题是"如何才能实现改变" The question is "how is change possible".
这个问题我们将在讲座中 And this is the question we are going to address in much greater
更深入在更高层次上讲 depth on a higher level of the spiral in these lectures.
改变是什么样的? 我们从微观上说 What does change look like? Let's go micro here.
去到大脑的层面 改变到底是什么模样的? Let's go to the brain level. How does change actually look like?
改变发生时 我们的大脑有什么变化? 直到1998年 What happens in our brain when change occurs? Until 1998,
神经科学家认为大脑是不变的 neuro scientists thought that the brain was essentially fixed.
我们生来具有一定的神经元 一定的通道 We are born with certain neurones,certain pathways.
大脑在三岁之后不会生长 不会改变 The brain doesn't grow,dosen't change pass the age of,say three
开始时大脑可能会改变发展 Maybe first a few experiences the brain still changes and evolves
但三岁之后 不会再改变 But after the age of three,no change.
这个理论直到1998年仍站得住脚 And this theory which was held until 1998-
也就是在不久以前 这个理论让人相信 I mean that's not so long ago,this theory gave credence,
并实际证明了 and actually proved positive for
"快乐是随机现象"的正确 "happiness is a stochastic phenomenon".
你生来具有一个的基因 You are born with certain genes.
生来具有一个的倾向 You are born with certain inclinations
具有一定的神经元通道 with certain neurone pathways.
有一些经历对你产生深刻影响 You have a few experiences that really affect you a great deal,
正如弗洛伊德的论点 而剩下的人生 as Freud argued. And then the rest of your life,
就是围绕那个水平波动 you are going to just fluctuate around that same level.
不会改变 直到1998年 No change. That was until 1998. In 1998,
科学家开始发现大脑其实是改变的 scientists started to notice that the brain actually does change.
并得出神经可塑性的概念 And they came up with the concept of neuroplasticity.
神经可塑性是指神经元有可塑性 它们会改变 Neuroplasticity are nuerones are plastic- they change.
不仅如此 不只大脑的通道会改变 Not only that,not only do the pathways change in the brain-
一会我们就会看到 and we'll look at it in a minute,
他们还得出另一个概念 but also they've come up with another concept,
即神经形成 神经元是发展的 which is neurogenesis. Neurones develop,
在人的一生中不断生成 直到我们死去 are created throughout our lives until the day we die potentially
因此 事实并不是 So it's not the fact that
我们生来具有一定的神经元 we are born with certain number of neurones
然后就一直走下坡 and it's downhill from there,
传统的认识让我们相信这种说法 as conventional wisdom had us to believe-
今天仍有很多人相信这种说法 as many people still believe today.
不 神经元是发展生长的 在人生过程中不断出现 No,neurones are developed and grow,emerge throughout our lives.
原来大脑在很多方面很像一块肌肉 The brain,it turns out,in many ways is like muscle:
使用它就不会失去它 使用它能让它再生 use it and you don't lose it. Use it and you generate,
让肌肉更发达 问题是 you build the muscle up. And the question is
要如何使用它 才能让它帮助我们 how do we use it so that it becomes an assistant in a way,
变得更加快乐 help toward becoming happier.
我们来看看大脑到底是什么样子的 So let's look at what the brain actually look like.
大脑里有数以百万计的通道 What it looks like is that there are millions of channels inside,
神经通道 不同神经元在大脑里的连接 neural pathways,connections between different neurones in brain
看上去就像这样 that look something like this.
你们能看到有些很薄 是新生的 As you can see,some are very thin,are relatively new.
有些更厚 更健全 some are much thicker,much more established.
它作用的方式很像自然界 And the way it works in many ways is like in nature.
即有大河 宽敞的渠道 You have large rivers,large channels.
也有小河 狭窄的渠道 And you have tiny rivers and tiny channels.
原理是这样的 And what happens is that
每次神经元之间发生联系 换言之 every time a connection is made between neurones- in other words,
你的思维模式有特定的路径运作 your thought pattern follows a certain path.
那个路径会成长 That path grows.
像河流一样 每次有水流过 Just like a river- every time the water passes there,
河流都会变得宽一些 it gets this much,this much wider.
没有水的时候 And when there is no water there,
神经元不工作时 there is no work being done in the neurone,
打个比方 它会萎缩一点 metaphorically speaking,it shrinks a little bit.
使用时神经通道得到扩展 So neural pathways grow with use
不使用时就会萎缩 and they shrink when there is no use.
如果一条新的神经通道刚刚生成 If it's something new,a new neural pathway that
因为神经是有可塑性的 was just created because remember- there's neuroplasticity.
神经通道不断生成 因为有神经形成 Neural pathways are created constantly. There is neurogenesis.
新的神经元不断生成 开始时很薄 New neutrones are created constantly. Initially it's very thin.
举个例子 我学法语 学了一个新词 Let's say for example,I study French. And I learn a new word.
我的大脑里形成新的联系 A new connection is made in my brain.
如果我只听了这个词一次 Now if I hear the word once and never again,
神经通道会分裂 会消失 the neural pathway will disintegrate,will disappear. However,
如果我不断重复听到那个词 if I continue hearing that word over and over and over again,
最后通道会变得越来越厚 after all it will become thicker and thicker.
我说的比实际过程简化得多 Ok this is a way over simplification of the real process.
但它会变得更厚 But it will become thicker.
我就会一生记得这个词 And then I'll remember it for the rest of my life.
就像形成了一条新的河流 It will be established like a river that is established,
不再是涓涓流淌的小溪 as opposed to a tiny stream and trickle
可能在某一天消失 that can disappear in a day.
这是我们理解改变思维的 And here is the key aspect for understanding
关键方面 how we can change our thought,
并最终提升我们的幸福感 how we can change our wellbeing ultimately.
神经通道会自我巩固的 像河流一样 The neural pathways are self-reinforcing,just like rivers are.
想一想 下雨时 下倾盆大雨时 Think about it: when it rains,when there is a down pour,
水流向已有的河流 the water gravitates toward the existing river,
流向渠道 流向我们建好的沟渠 toward the channels,toward the drains that we have built.
如果之前什么都没有 It's much less likely to create a new river
那么形成一条河流或小溪会更难 or a new stream with there's nothing before.
我们的经历也更倾向于流向 So the experience is much likely to gravitate to
已建成的神经通道并进一步加固它 already established neural pathways and strengthen it further,
而不是生成一条新的神经通道 as opposed to create new neural pathways,
所以如果我们想记住什么东西 which is why if we want to remember something,
和其他东西产生联系是个很好的方法 it's very good to make connections to other things,
和已有的神经通道 已有的记忆产生联系 to existing neural pathways,to existing memories.
让我再解释一次 Let me explain this again,
理解这一点很重要 because this is important to understand.
理解这一点 其实... Because understanding this can actually...
这是Carol Dweck 斯坦福的教授的研究结论 this is something that Carol Dweck,professor at Stanford showed
理解神经可塑性 and understanding this neuroplasiticity,
理解我们如何实现改变 understanding how we actually can change can make us
能让我们更容易成功 more likely to succeed in one of the ways of success-
能让我们更加快乐 理解这一点很重要 to actually become happier. So it's important to understand.
已建成的神经通道吸引更多活动 And established neural pathway attracts more action
从而变得更厚 and it attracts more action and gets thicker.
没有建成的通道 Something that's not established,
一条小溪更容易消失 a tiny little stream is more likely to be just wiped away.
当它变得更宽 就更可能保留下来 As it grows more,it's more likely to stay,
不仅保留下来而且能继续生长 not just stay,grow even more.
它是自行巩固的 习惯就是如此 It is self-reinforcing. And this is what habits are.
一种做法被反复巩固 When something is reinforced over and over again,
就变成一种习惯 比如打网球 it becomes a habit. For example,you play tennis
你反反复复运用正手击球 and you hit the forehand over and over and over again.
开始时你要考虑怎么打 必须集中精神 Initially you have to think about it. You have to concentrate.
手腕翘起来一点 You have to,you know,maybe cock your wrist a little bit,
知道球拍应该停在哪里 maybe understand exactly where you stop the racket,
但一段时间之后 挥过几百几千次后 but after a while, after doing it hunderds of, thousands of times
你不用再考虑怎么打 you don't need to think about it anymore.
它已经刻成槽 我使用"刻成槽"这个词 It's already grooved. And the word that I used is grooved,
因为事实上你创造了一条新渠道 specifically because you essentially created a new channel.
只有有球飞过来 And whenever a ball comes toward you,
你不需要再考虑 automatically you don't even need to think about it.
它被吸引 It gravitates.
你的思维被引向那个或那些特别的通道 Your mind gravitates toward that particular path or paths,
很多通道 告诉你"举起球拍击球" many paths that tell you "lift it up and hit".
完全是自动的 音乐也是如此 It's automatic. Same with music.
经常练习演奏的人 And what it has shown is people who practice music regularly
或经常练习一种运动的人 or practice a sport regularly,
他们的大脑真的会改变形状 their brain actually changes its shape.
更多神经通道在那个区域形成 More neural pathways are created around these areas
"让我演奏C调" that mean "let me play a C now"
"让我的手指这样移动" or "let me move my fingers in this way"
根据我看到的乐章 based on somthing that I see on the page.
特定的神经通道被创造出来 Certain neural pathways are created,
大脑在那些区域变成更厚 and the brain actually becomes thicker in these areas.
更多经验流入 做得越多 经验流入的越多 Or more experience flow in: the more we do it,the more they flow
直到它变成沟槽 Until it becomes grooved
让我不需要考虑就能演奏降C调 and I don't need to think about how to play C-.
完全是自动的 他们做过一项研究 It's automatic. They did a research.
这是做过的首批研究中的一项 This was the first research,one of the first research projects
让他们发现大脑其实是改变的 where they found the brain actually changes.
他们让伦敦的出租车司机或新手司机 They took taxi drivers or freshly minted taxi drivers from London
他们如果想获得执业证 And what they had to do,to become,to get their certificate,
他们的许可 他们必须学习伦敦地图 their approval,they had to study the map of London.
伦敦地图 Now the map of London is much more complicated
比纽约地图复杂得多 than study the map of New York.
去过伦敦的人都知道 Those of you who have been to London.
但他们花很多时间研究地图 But they studied and they spent a lot of time.
他们发现司机们的大脑 What they found was the brain,
他们的视觉皮质的一部分发生变化 part of their visual cortex actually changed from
在司机学习伦敦地图前后 before they started to study the maps of London to after.
因为他们在使用那部分大脑 Because they were working that part of the brain.
他们有经验 They had experiences.
这些经验在大脑中形成沟槽 And these experiences created grooves inside their brain,
当有人说"牛津广场"时 他们立即知道 so when someone said "Oxford Circus",immediately they knew
要走哪条街才能去到牛津广场 what street they need to take to Oxford Circus.
他们的大脑变得更大 Their brain actually became bigger.
那改变了他们的神经可塑性 那是个好消息 It changed their neuroplasiticity. And that's wonderful news.
是非常好的消息 那意味着我们可以控制 It's really wonderful news. Because it means we have control.
我们可以引入改变 And we can introduce change.
在大脑中既有健康通道也有不健康的 Now in our brain,there are both healthy and unhealthy pathways.
比如说 So for example,
一些消极的通道 一个总是忧心重重的人 some of the negative channels may be one of the constant worrier-
一个事事担心的人 只要有事发生 someone who worries a lot. That every time something happens,
他们立即转向 immediately they gravitate to
"那对未来意味着什么?" "ok so what does that mean for the future?"
"那对我的期望意味着什么?" Or "what does that mean now for my prospects?"
"那对今天意味着什么?" 时刻担心各种事情 "What does it mean for today?" Constantly worrying about things.
甚至经常为好事担心 Even good things very often.
他们会立即把好事理解成需要担心的事 They immediately interpret it as something to be worry about.
或者发现缺陷 消极思维会通过那条大脑通道 Or fault finding. That's pathways in the brain where I look for-
再说一次 通道是自行巩固的 again they are self-reinforcing-
我会通过那条通道不断寻找我的缺陷 I begin to look for in my world things that go wrong.
我还记得自己的亲身经历 Remember my personal experience
当我获得本校的奖学金时 where I got the fellowship as a senior here.
我得到了奖学金 但我的大脑立即开始想 And I got the fellowship and immediately my brain gravitated
"但我为什么没得到另一个?" toward "Ok but why didn't I get the other one?"
我有那么多事情值得感激 I had so many things to be grateful for.
但作为消极者 神经通道 But it's the fault finder immediately the neural pathway,
经验流向的河流是条最大的河 the river this experience fell into was the largest one.
当时对我来说 最宽的河流就是消极的 And the largest one for me at that time was being a fault finder.
也有积极的渠道 Then there are positive channels as well.
积极的渠道是什么? 积极者 What are the positive channels? Benefit finder. A person
一个即使在困难环境也能发现恩惠的人 who is able to find benefit even in the hard circumstances.
也许不会说塞翁失马 焉知非福 May not say that the things happen for the best,
但他会从发生的事情中寻找恩惠 but something,but people made the best of things happen.
乐观主义者 The optimist.
乐观主义的渠道更大更宽 Again,much larger,much wider channels for optimism.
经验流向那里 And the experiences gravitate toward there.
今天我们对大脑的认识更多 Today we know much more how the brain works.
这些渠道存在在哪里? And where these channels exist?
我给大家举个众所周知的例子 so let me give you an example of the one of the things we know.
我们都知道 One of the things that we know is that people
经常使用左侧前额皮质的人 who have more action on the left side of the prefrontal cortex,
和经常使用右侧前额皮质的人相比 compared to the right side of the prefrontal cortex,
要更快乐 更易受积极情绪的影响 are general happier. More susceptible to positive emotions,
对痛苦情绪的适应性更强 more resilient in phase of painful emotions.
前额皮质这部分的活动更多 More activation here- prefrontal cortex,
与右侧前额皮质相比 compared to the right side of the prefrontal cortex.
右侧活动更多的人 People who have more activation on the right side compard to
和左侧活动更多的人相比要更压抑 the left of f the prefrontal cortex are generally more depressed.
今天我们知道这些 是因为有功能性磁共振成像 Now we know that today because we have FMRI,
因为我们有脑电图 because we have EEG.
能看到大脑两侧的运作 We can see how much the brain works on each side.
但几百年前 我们已经知道这一点了 But we knew that already hundreds of years ago.
我们知道这边与积极情绪有关 We knew that this side is associated with positive emotions,
前额皮质这侧的活动越多 and more activation on this side of the front,
与痛苦情绪相关联 is associated with painful emotions.
怎么知道的? 因为人们发生意外时 How? Because when people,for example were in an accident,
意外发生在他们身上 and the accident happened to them
左侧前额皮质受损时 and the left side of the prefrontal cortex was damaged,
他们经常变得更抑郁 very often they became more depressed.
因为右侧的活动更多 Because they had more activation on the right side as a result.
相比而言 In comparison,
另一方面如果意外发生在右侧 people who had an accident on the right side on the other hand,
右侧受损 人们经常会变得更快乐 on the right side,very often,became happier.
我不建议以此为干预方法 Now I don't recommen this as an intervention.
不管有没有父母在家 都不要在家尝试 Don't try it at home without your parents or with your parents.
但是如果走在街上 碰巧摔倒 However,if you walk in the street,and you happen to fall,
最好往这边摔 大家记往了 it's always better to fall this way. So just keep that in mind.
需要记住的更重要的事是 Important thing to keep in mind then is that
相同的刺激往往造成不同的反应 very often the same trigger causes very different reactions.
世界不只是外在世界 Again the world is not just the external world.
还有一个内在世界 It's also the internal world.
记往对同一个头脑来说 正如爱默生所说 Remember to the same mind,as Emerson said,
同样的世界...对不同的头脑来说 the same world can be... or to the different minds,
同样的世界即可能是天堂也可能是地狱 the same world can be a heaven or a hell.
要看那种经验流向哪里 Depends on what that experience gravitates toward.
多年来 我变得 Over the years,I've become a much more,
更像一个积极者 通过修习 much more of a benefit finder through the exercise,
通过沉思 通过书写 写日记 through thinking about it,by writting,keeping a journal,
通过身体锻炼 我变成了积极者 by physically exercising,I become much more of a benefit finder.
为此我付出很多努力 I've done a lot of work in that.
我人生最大的财富 One of the great fortunes in my life is that
是我娶了一个完美的积极者 I married a consummate benefit finder.
我的妻子Tommy 她不需要后天的努力 Tommy,my wife doesn't have to work that hard at it.
举个例子 我们参加一次派对回来 So for example,we would come back from a party.
派对上有个人一个劲地说话 And there was someone at the party who couldn't stop talking.
你们遇到过吗...一个说个不停的人 Have you encountered a person... Well,couldn't stop talking.
我正要和Tommy抱怨 And I just about to tell Tommy you know,
说个人就是个话痨 this person just couldn't shut his or her mouth.
她在我开口前说了什么? 她说 And what would she say before I open my mouth? She said,
"你看那个人多好 "see how wonderful that person was
他对所做的事是如此热情?" and he or she is so passionate about what they do?"
在我眼中多话 在她眼中是热情 So for me,it was talkative. For her,it was passion.
她自动地发现恩惠 Again,automatically going there.
这里有基因因素 我们会谈到基因 There is a genetic set point- and we'll talk about the genes-
让某些人比其他人更善于发现益处 that lead some people to be much more benefit finders than others
但与此同时 我们可以加以培养 But at the same time,we can work on it.
我们可以一条通道一条通道地塑造 We can work on it,pathway by pathway. And
我们所做的就是改变大脑 what we are doing there is quite literally transforming the brain
我们会在讲到"念"和"冥想"时讲这个问题 We'll talk about during the week on mindfulness meditation
冥想 比如经常做瑜珈 that meditation- for instance regular yoga- actually makes our..
能改变我们大脑里的通道 changes the pathwaya in our brain,
让左侧相比右侧更活跃 makes it more active on the left side compared to the right side.
让我们更易受到积极情绪的感染 Makes it more susceptible to positive emotions,
对痛苦情绪有更好的承受力 more resilient to the phase of painful emotions.
我们可以改变大脑 利用神经可塑性和神经形成 We can change the brain. Neuroplasiticity and neurogenesis.
下周我们会谈到两种类型的改变 We are going to talk about two types of change in this next week.
第一种是渐进的改变 The first type of change is the gradual approach.
这种改变是一点点凿掉多余的石头 This is the change of gradually chipping away excess stone.
这种改变 This is the change that
就像自然界的水冲刷石块 we see in nature with the water sweeping away the stone,
历经时日 让石块变得更薄更光滑 making it thinner over time,making it smoother.
渐进的改变 这是世上最常见的改变 The gradual change. This is the change we mostly see in the world
这是健康的改变 没有捷径 需要时间 It's the healthy change. There is no quick fix. It takes time.
然而改变的过程可以和结果一样让人享受 However,the change process can be as enjoyable as the outcome.
想想学习演奏乐器 Think about how to learn to play musical instrument.
它需要时间 是相同的过程 It takes time. It's by the way the same process,
因为我们在大脑里创造新的神经通道 because we are creating new neural pathways in our brain,
当我们学习演奏乐器时 when we are learning musical instrument.
我们享受十年的学习过程 We can enjoy the process that ten years
最后在Leverett学生社交室里举办的音乐会上演奏 that it takes us to get to play in a concert in Leverett JCR.
我们可以享受最后站在台上演奏前的乐趣 We can enjoy the process of getting there before we are there.
所以改变本身也可以很有趣 So the change process in and of itself can also be fun.
我们即能享受过程也能享受结果 We can enjoy the journey as well as the destination.
它需要时间 很多时间 It takes time. A lot of time.
也有实现改变的剧烈方法 Then there is also the acute approach to change.
如果用水冲刷石头 You know if the metaphore for the gradual change
来比喻渐进的改变 was the water breaking down stone,
可以用拿大锤 the metaphore for acute approach is taking a sledgehammer
砸石头来比喻剧烈的改变 and breaking the water,breaking the stone.
就像摩西那样 剧烈的改变 You know what Moses did. The acute change.
不需要太多时间 立即发生 Takes... Dosen't take much time. It happens immediately.
但要记住的重要的一点是 But the important thing to keep in mind,
剧烈的改变不是一步奏效 剧烈的改变 with the acute change is it's not a quick fix. The acute change,
经常需要很多准备功夫 打个比方 very often,takes a lot of preparation,metaphorically speaking-
你需要很多力气去挥大锤 You need a lot of strength to pick up the hammer
还要有力气砸下去 and to have the power to put it down.
所以也需要时间 两者都需要时间 So it takes time. Both take time.
记往这一点很重要 为什么? Martin Seligman说过 And that's important to keep in mind. Why? Martin Seligman:
"相信有捷径通向满足 “The belief that we can rely on shortcuts to gratification
绕过个人力量和美德的训练 and bypass the exercise of personal strengths
是很蠢的 它导致很多人 and virtues is folly. It leads to legions of humanity
在坐拥巨大财富时感到抑郁 who are depressed in the middle of great wealth
精神饥渴而死" and are starving to death spiritually."
这是当今世界不快乐的 This is one of the main reasons
一个主要原因 我先提示一下 for the unhappiness in the world today. I alluded to it
我会在结束前多讲一些 but I want to elaborate it a little bit more before we end.
有多少同学读过 How many here have read,by the way,
Stephen Covey的《高效能人士的七个习惯》 the Seven Habits of Highly Effective People,Stephen Covey.
好 不少同学读过 很好的一本书 Ok. Quite a few. It's a wonderful book.
就算不是最好也是其中之一的自励书 One of the best,if not the best self-help books out there.
Stephen Covey在书的开头 Stephen Covey at the beginning of the book
谈到他的博士论文的研究课题 talks about the research that he did for his PHD.
他所做的是 And what he did was look
看过去200年来成功学著作 at the success literature of the last 200 years.
他发现1930年是个分界线 And what he found was that there was a real cut-off point in 1930
1930年之前 19世纪和20世纪初 Until 1930,19th century and the beginning of the 20th century,
自励在于性格改变 self-help was about character change.
从内在改变自己 It was about changing who you are from inside.
需要努力挣扎 跌倒再爬起 It was about struggling in hard work and failing and going,
经历苦难 getting up again. Going through hardships.
一步步地改变 缓慢渐进地实现 And changing step by step,slowly,gradually.
1930年剧烈改变 从性格改变变成一步奏效 1930- radical change. From character change,it became quick fix.
想发财 Thinking grow rich.
如何结交权势 现在就做 How to win friends in influent people. Do it now.
秘密就是 快速改变 立即改变 轻易的改变 The secret- quick change,immediate change,easy change.
1930年代以来 And from the 1930s,
我们看到人们幸福感不断下降 what we see is a decline in people's level of well being.
人变得更加抑郁 更加焦虑 Much more depression. Much more anxiety.
其中一个原因就是 And one of the reasons is that.
人们希望相信他们能发到一步奏效的办法 That people hope and believe that they can find quick fix.
没有一步奏效的办法 需要时间去实现改变 There is no quick fix. It takes time. It takes time to change.
但改变的过程可以是很享受的 However,the change process can be as enjoyable,
如同最终实现改变一样乐趣无穷 令人兴奋 as fun,as exciting as ultimately achieving the change.
下周我们就会谈到这个美妙的过程 And next week we'll talk about that wonderful process.
祝大家周未愉快 Have a good weekend.