教授:在柏拉图的理想国观念中 Prof: In terms of his republic
谈到了这样一个育儿体系 he talks about he has this system of child care
在这个体系里 A system where he thinks that the leadership
他写到领导者 he writes that the leadership
这里他们被称之为监护人 the guardians they're called
要培育出优等的孩子 and the leading class that they should take
首先他鼓励优生 意即生育 Well first of all, he encourages eugenics, meaning breeding
为了培育出最优的后代 like having certain people breeding together
而把某些特定的人聚在一起 to produce the best offspring
但是即使在这些人当中 But then even among those people
其中一些人也不......他写到 and some of the people aren't, he has this thing
会有一个团队来决定 where a group of people decide
谁应和谁配对 who's suppose to mate with each other
对此他们会保密 and they kind of keep it a secret
一些领导层的人们 that some people among the kind of leading class
不会和其他人配对 don't get to mate with somebody else
当孩子们出生3天后 But then when the babies are born
他们从自己的父母身边被抱走 the babies are taken at the 4th day from their parents
然后把他们放在共同的托儿所一起抚养 and then reared together in a common nursery
在孩子婴幼儿阶段 so that they all get good and equal kind of upbringing and nurturing
让他们都能获得同等的优质培育 for their early days of life
事实上一旦孩子被生下来就会被抱走 And in fact once the infant is taken from the mom after birth
连妈妈们自己也不知道这个秘密 then the mom isn't allowed to know
不知道哪个孩子是自己生的 and keep it a secret who the actual kid is of that mom
这是为了就像我说的 The idea is, like I said, that making sure
为了保证这里的每个孩子的后天培育相同 that the nurturing is the same for these kids
把他们都培养成优质高等的人 who are going to be the leading class, are also of high quality
事实上以色列的基布茨集体农庄 Well. That's true, the Kibbutz in Israel
在某种程度上就和这种集体模式有着相似之处 the Kibbutz is a setting that is actually in a way similar
基布茨模式的背后动因更多的是宗教上的 It was motivated more for religious reasons
人们试图建立一个理想的社会体系 but people trying to develop the ideal system of society
在当时的以色列某些区域 They were kind of like sub-cultures
他们形成了一种亚文化 within, well, what became Israel in that area
一些犹太家庭结合到一起 Jewish families bonding together
试着为自己创建一个理想的国度 to try and build an ideal society for their
这里不仅仅是我们观念中的理想社会 and not just an ideal society
而是一个基于优质性别的绝对理想社会 but the ideal society was a quality, a gender quality based society
这里男人和女人平等的参加劳动 where both men and women participated in work equally
他们也采取了几个步骤 And they took different steps
来确保男女所受的教育都是平等的 to make sure the education of men and women were equal
事实上他们所发展的是一场运动 and they actually developed and this was a movement
现在这种集体农庄仍然存在 and it still exists
但是在形式上有了些变化 but is has kind of changed forms
关于这点我会讲到一些 And I'll talk about that in a little bit
在20世纪初期他们开始建立基布茨 So like early in the 20th century they started following Kibbutz
这种模式很大程度上是以农业生产为基础的 and they're very agriculturally based as well
农业是优先考虑的事 Farming was a priority
依赖基布兹 他们建立起了一个 And so they set up a system where typically
各尽所能的集体模式 they all could have slightly different roles depending on the Kibbutz
这里的孩子们从小就离开了父母 But the idea was that kids from early in life
然后聚在一起 在孤儿院里长大 would be reared together in a dorm together in an orphanage
我讨厌孤儿院这个称呼 I hate to call it that
通常孤儿院这个词会让你们产生负面的联想 but orphanage you typically think of have a negative connotation
但是这里应该说是社区看护中心 but a communal care center
允许孩子看望父母或父母探望孩子 and allowed to see their parents, or parents to see them
一天2到3个小时但是不在晚上探望 maybe 2 to 3 hours a day, and not at nighttime necessarily
可能是在傍晚的时候 maybe in the late afternoon
这时候他们已经彼此明确了血缘关系 Now they know who their kids are
并不是绝对的柏拉图式的 It wasn't as extreme as Plato was talking about
社区把这些孩子聚在一起 And again the idea was having these kids
在良好的教育环境下一起抚养 that are reared under good conditions
为了保证这一点 By doing that they allowed women
他们还定期轮流把女人们 they took the women into the Kibbutz
送到看护中心照料孩子们 would take turns rotating being the kind of caregiver at the center
还允许其他的女人们从事农业生产 to allow other women to kind of take on jobs, agricultural jobs
和农庄里其它的一些工作 other kinds of jobs on the Kibbutz
这样就可以达到更高的专业素质 so that kind of more professional quality could be reached
事实上就这种育儿模式的结果而言 And, in fact in terms of child outcomes
一些记录基布茨的书里 that's one of the kind of places that what the book talks about
在某些地方写到 that it is talking about the Kibbutz some
事实上这样抚养大的孩子 which is that infants were in fact
我记得自己在课堂上提起过 I think I might have mentioned this as well, in class at some point
也能形成多重依恋关系 able to form multiple attachments
他们的确会形成对父母的依恋关系 They did in fact form attachments to their parents
也会形成对任何最初照料他们的人的依恋关系 but also to whoever their primary caregiver was
这样看来就孩子社会发展的结果而言 So, it didn't seem necessarily have natural mental
自然心智育儿模式似乎并不尽然就是唯一的 outcomes for the kids' social development
但是这些推动基布茨形成的崇高的理想 However, these high ideals that motivated the Kibbutz
在过去的三四十年里发生了变化 changes have occurred in the last 30 years, 40 years
事实上在整个20世纪 Well, actually has been changing some
这...... 就不断在改变 throughout the century or the last century
这些崇高的理想会起作用吗 But, in terms of whether that ideal would work
就女人们取得的专职工作权利而言 women, you know, the good ideals about
的确起到了作用 kind of evolving in women professional jobs
但是越来越多的基布茨妇女要求 but women were demanding more and more in different Kibbutz's
花更多的时间来陪伴自己的孩子 more time with their infants
相对于每天只有几个小时的探望时间 They didn't like being separated from their infants
她们并不喜欢和自己的孩子分开 for all but a couple hours a day
从我看过的书中 我理解中的事实是 And the truth is that in my understanding from what I've read
我从未去过基布茨 I've never been over to a Kibbutz
之前有谁去过吗？ Has anyone ever been on a Kibbutz before?
没有 No, no, Ok
我的理解是这些绝对平等的理想 That, I mean this ideal of equality
事实上从未完全达到 was actually never totally reached that
不错 女人们的确有了工作 Yeah, women had jobs
但是在这之前她们必需证明自己 but early on they had to kind of prove
能够胜任一系列和农业生产相关的 that they could do the kind of physical labor
体力劳动 related to the agriculture
比如类似耕地这样的重体力劳动 Certain types of jobs, you know like tilling and things like that
要求有更强健的体格 that require a little more physical strength
所以在过去的这些年里 And that through the years
尽管她们有着和男人们一样的平等工作的权利 even though that they were all equally in jobs
但是实际所从事的却大不相同 the jobs that women got weren't the same as
农业劳动被认为是具有更高荣耀的工作 agricultural jobs were seen as higher prestige jobs
女人们更多的是做 The women were more doing kind of
一些缝缝补补的事 making cloths and things like that
所以绝对的平等是不可能的 So there was never full equality
女人们也越来越希望有更多的时间陪孩子 But the women were demanding more and more time with their kids
这些崇高的理想看似美好 So this high ideal sounded good
落到实处女人对自己需要的东西却没有决定权 but it wasn't exactly what the women decided they wanted
她们需要更多的时间单独陪伴她们的孩子 They need more individual time with their kids
正如依恋理论家约翰·鲍尔比 And this is exactly what a attachment theorist John Bowlby
曾经预测的那样 would have predicted or would predict
依恋关系并不仅仅单向的存在于婴儿身上 That not just, this attachment is not just in the babies
即他们需要依赖照料者 that need to attach and find
并从照料者身上找到了安全感 security in their caregivers
对照料者自身而言 在依恋施予者身上 but it's also the revolutionary evolved to
它也已经革命性的演化成一种内在机制 kind of have mechanisms in us as caregivers
照料者在这些本能机制的推动下 and especially and possibly through it to kind of take care of
照顾孩子并要求更多的时间陪伴他们 and be that kind of face that finds time for the kids
回到这种模式是否起作用的问题上来 So then to answer the question of would it work
就基布茨孩子们的社会成果而言 It might work, it could work
它可能的确是起到了一些作用 in terms of social outcomes for the kid
但是逻辑上这种育儿模式是很难办到的 but logistically it would be difficult to have this kind of setting
因为我认为尤其是这种社会体系下的女人 because I think the women in particular in this society
会要求有更多的面对面的机会 would demand kind of more face to face time
以及晚上的时间来陪伴自己的孩子 and evening time with their kids
今天我们的主题是依恋关系 Today we're going to talk about attachment
你们也了解了一些 You've read about it some
我们要一起探讨几个 We're going to talk about a couple different questions
和依恋关系相关的问题 related to attachment
什么是依恋关系？ What is it?
这种关系是如何形成的？ Where does it come from?
对我们的发展会有怎样的影响？ What does it mean for our development?
提问部分之前我们先回答这些问题 And, well, and we will answer it before question
你们知道约翰·鲍尔比 John Bowlby, you read about him
他是依恋理论的开创者 He's the founder of attachment theory
一个精神分析学家 He was a psycho-analyst
也就是说他的理论方法是弗洛伊德式的 That means he, his psychoanalysis was Freudian
精神分析由弗洛伊德首创并延续至今 kind of the ideas that Freud started that still exist today
那就是深入人精神层面的意识和无意识 Looking into the psyche the conscious and the unconscious
试图找出冲突的根源 trying to figure out conflicts
现在的心理学家们并不是都持有这种思维模式 Not exactly the way of thinking that most psychologists have now
但是约翰·鲍尔比受到了这种分析方法的影响 but he was influenced by this
通过对二战后孤儿的调研 Bowlby, he wrote in the 50's and the 60's
在上世纪五六十年代他开始著书立说 And he started by reviewing kind of orphanages after World War II
这些孤儿的父母死于战争 Parents who had died because of the war
或是因为其它什么原因不能照顾自己的孩子 or for whatever reason, couldn't take care of their infants
他观察这类情况下的孩子 Looking at, kind of how did the kids turn out
有着怎样的行为模式 in those situations and those settings
他发现通常头六个月的婴儿 And he found that often in the first six months of life
仅有半岁的年幼的孩子 for kids that were as early as six months of life
在孤儿院里抚养看似并没有什么不妥 reared in orphanage seemed fine
但是随后就表现出了一系列的症状 but then developed a lot of symptoms
即使是还在婴儿期 婴儿末期 even in infancy, later in infancy
严重迟钝 社会行为异常 Severely retarded, abnormal social behaviors
没有互动 kind of not interacting
与照料者之间的情感互动不一致 not kind of consistent interactions with caregivers
通常是对照料者感受迟钝 often unresponsive to the caregivers
甚至表现出抑郁 食欲不振 or even depressed or poor appetites
通常焦虑的一个典型特征 Poor appetite suppression
就是食欲不振 is often a characteristic of that kind of anxiety
还有抑郁症状 or depression
通常这些孩子稍稍长大后就沦为小偷 And then as they got older they often stole
或变得更加的抑郁 or more depress
并不是所有的这类孩子都会变成小偷 And not necessarily all the kids that would be threats
但是比你们想到的还多 but more than you would expect
二战后 After World War II, the conditions
这些由战后国家组合建立的孤儿院的条件 in these type of orphanages that these countries put together
都有所提升 often improved
很大程度上得益于一些早期的工作 largely because of some of the early writings and early work
比如有了更多的促进因素 such as there were more stimulation
比如有更多的照料者 like more caregivers
更多的认知刺激以发展孩子的认知能力 and more cognitive stimulation to develop kids' cognitive abilities
然后到了70年代 And so then in the 70's
另外一个关于孤儿的调研 like, another review of orphanages
发现这些孩子的认知发展行为 found that the cognitive development action
比最初所记录的要好 looked better than the original wrote about
但事实上他们的一些社会行为还是差强人意 But that in fact, still the social outcomes were not so right
他们有时对陌生人会过分的友好 They were sometimes overly friendly with strangers
而和自己的照料者通常不能建立亲密关系 They often lacked close relationships with caregivers
对他们而言要发展一种亲密关系似乎很困难 They had a hard time developing an intimacy
在学校里不受欢迎 反叛 And then again, in school they were unpopular, disobedient
各种各样的原因 and different reasons
为什么他们就不能和其他孩子和谐相处 why they weren't getting along well with others kids
为什么呢？ Well, so why is that?
鲍尔比在思索这些事情 Bowlby in thinking about these things
我说过他受到过弗洛伊德学说的影响 like I said, Bowlby he was influenced by Freud
但他也不是全盘相信 but he never totally believed
弗洛伊德的那套无意识的东西 this unconscious stuff that Freud talked about
这里鲍尔比讲到了道德准则阶段 Bowlby talked about the moral stage
婴儿应对伦理困境的能力 and an infants' ability to reconcile the moral stage
就像弗洛伊德和一些追随他的人所认为的 Like Freud and some others after Freud talked about the infant
比如母乳哺育 and like breastfeeding
如果和照顾者之间的关系存在问题 and if there's a problem with the relationship with the caregiver
如果得不到正常的母乳哺育 and if you're not breastfeeding normally
婴儿在口感上就无法适应 you know there's kind of oral you're not reconciled about
不知道应该去哪儿获取营养 where to get your nourishment from
这会对孩子以后的发展造成不良影响 You know, that's going to kind of have problems for you later
现在我们并不就真的相信这些说法 Well, now we don't really believe in these kind of
那些弗洛伊德所认为的伦理困境的表现 moral and moral stages that Freud talked about
会对下一个阶段有着长期的不良影响 for the next, long-term implications we seems to we talked about
鲍尔比却受到了这种影响 Bowbly was influenced that
神学研究家康拉德·洛伦兹 but also in terms of mythologists, Conrad Lawrence
我们讲到过他的鹅研究 who, we talked about him, the guy with the geese
可能就是从这个研究中了解到他的 probably know him from 100
刚从蛋里孵出的小鹅 that in geese, when they come out of the egg
会跟着 the first thing that they see, it's called imprinting
第一眼所见到的东西走 这叫做铭记 they'll like follow the first thing they see
这似乎是一种物种进化适应本能 and that seems to be an evolutionary adaptation
一种类似于鹅所见的机制 Sort of mechanisms that are similar to what the geese seen
你们所看到的这个视频 What you have probably seen in the video
其中的4只鹅正围绕着8只鸭子或鹅转 Four of them are walking around with 8 ducks or geese
跟在它们身后 因为它们本身有铭记特征 following around, because they have imprinting feature
同时在视频里我们还看到 And then also at the same time, Perry Harlow
佩里·哈罗在某个层面上 who we saw in the video in another level about
还谈到了依恋关系 was talking about attachment
通过对猕猴的研究 and, just studies on the Rhesus monkeys
一系列数据表明 And kind of showing from packs of data
即使在婴儿阶段 that maybe it's not about, even from early in life
孩子对照顾者的依恋关系也不仅是食物 our attachments to caregivers, isn't about food
更多的则是一种情感上的东西 so much as kind of a more and more emotional thing
一种情感上的依附关系 An attachment, an emotional attachment
必然和身处这个世界而需要的 that has to do with calming down
心灵的抚慰和安全感相连 and feeling security in the world
所以这里我给你们的依恋关系的定义就是 So let me give you a definition of attachment
母婴之间或是与照顾者之间持久的情感纽带 An enduring emotional tie between both infant and caregiver
它是生存发展所需 包括觅食寻求庇护 It evolved for survival, including finding food but also protection
在某种程度上是婴儿们 And it's an attempt in a sense
尝试着去维持与照顾者之间的亲密联系 by the infant to maintain close contact with the caregiver
而且婴儿本身也用某种神秘的方式 We hopely saw the infant
操控着他们的照顾者 as manipulative of the caregiver in a way
有时并不仅仅是照顾者想要去照顾他们 And it's not just that the care giver wanted to take care of the kid
而是孩子们的某些表征行为 but the kid is doing things
让我们不得不亲近他们 that reflect things to keep people close to us
这些东西推动着依恋关系的运作 to do these things, functions of the attachment figure
比如婴儿的哭喊声 So, for example, crying
我们学过情感 像哭喊就是悲伤的信号 You know, we read about emotions, like crying as a distress signal
身体不适等让我们进化了哭泣的情感 for why we evolved to cry, physical discomfort
当听到婴儿哭喊时 and that we seem to have a kind of natural reaction
我们似乎有一种本能的反应去亲近他们 to hearing crying that keeps us close to infants
还有笑容传递了一种渴望与人交往的社会信号 Smiles we talked about as indicating a social bond
不仅仅是婴儿的笑容 It's not just a infant smile
任何笑容都会让人情不自禁亲近起来 but any smile that kind of pulls us in
当然通过认知控制 You know, with people with cognitive controls
人们可以对那些满面笑容的人或婴儿视而不见 we can walk away from that person or that infant who is smiling
但一些小小的本能微妙反应却让我们身不由己 But there is a little something there that pulls us in
它们本身也是物种进化的需要 with the smile and has evolved
并使我们成为群体 and pull us in a group more
鲍尔比还讲到过丘比特娃娃效应 Bowbly also talked about something called the Kewpie Doll Effect
有谁知道丘比特娃娃吗？ Does anyone know what the Kewpie Doll is?
好像流行于50年代末 It was a doll in the late 50's apparently
这里讲的是是婴儿的一些身体特征 The idea is that maybe, there are even
可以引发他人的关爱 physical features of infants that bring us in
大家知道就好比 You know, when we see like
孩子们看到电视里的那些可爱的小动物 TV, they have TV videos of like animal pets
他们会情不自禁的做一些行为引发他人的关爱 And they may all like to do with stuff
同样的 婴儿们的一些体态特征 But the same thing with infants it seems that
也会让我们的心变得柔软 makes us soft
比如他们的可爱 but that is cute
可能并不是我们了解的那样 Well, maybe that's not just something we have learned
要爱护他们 about liking infants and caring for them
实际上可能是因为他们的一些身体特征 but maybe there's actually something about physical features
大家见过 You know we've seen
我们说过宝宝们的头都是大大的 how we've talked about how the head is bigger
还有其他一些圆乎乎的特征 But there's also kind of more round features
越小的婴儿更加胖乎乎的 more fat, content proportionally with younger infants
这个理论似乎跨物种成立 and there seems to be some truth to it across species
所以可能就正是因为婴儿的这些体态特征 And that maybe, in fact these very physical features
激发了照顾者内心的柔情 in kids are pulling us in as well
让彼此间保持亲密关系 keeping us in close contact
我不知道是否有这类针对性研究 Now, I don't know good research that has really pin-pointed
证明这个理论的真实性 whether this is true or not
婴儿对我们造成的这些反应是真实的 this effect is true as opposed to the idea that
就像我刚说过的 like I was just saying a minute ago
人一生中很多反应是联想的产物 certainly throughout life they are associations
比如我们看到那些无辜可爱的小东西 where we see little innocent things
我们就会把他们和婴儿联系起来 and we've learned to kind of associate things with that
所以婴儿们圆圆的特征 So it is just round the features
也是一种自我保护的进化 how it has kind of evolved to kind of protect them
就像我们看到圆圆的篮球会有一种保护欲 So, we feel protective of basketballs and things like that
这可能还不是关键的特征 So it's probably not just the critical characteristic there
你们读过还有本能反应 Reflexes. Reflexes you read about, the kid being held onto
婴儿们持有的抓挠反应 这些本能的触碰 The grasping reflex, the rooting reflex where we go like this
我们喜欢这种被需要的感觉 kind of that touch and that need for touch
正是这些感觉让母婴之间亲密联系 is something that pulls us together
这些也是宝宝们操控妈妈为他们服务的手段 in ways in which infants are kind of manipulating us to hold onto them
(听不清)是对我们有益的 and (INAUDIBLE) is good for us
他们通常也试着让我们和他们接触 And they are certainly often times trying to get us to touch them
依恋关系是如何 What does attachment do
在面临困境时营造安全的心理港湾 to maintain a safe haven in times of danger
一个能让他们向前探索的安全基地？ and a secure base for exploration?
依恋关系是如何发展的？ How does attachment develop?
事实上30年前 Actually a study with Scottish 30 years ago
罗·斯辰夫和爱默生在苏格兰做过这样一个研究 People Lo Schaeffer and Emerson
但是依恋体制是怎么发展形成的呢？ but what's the development of this attachment system?
可能只有那些天天和婴儿呆在一起的人 And people who have spent time with infants
才会略知一二 probably can relate to these things
这里有几个相关的问题 and the question is. Well, a couple questions
婴儿们关心是谁在照看他们吗 Do infants seem to care whether its people
人或者动物？ taking care of them or not people?
这些他们正在看着的东西 These are the kind of things they were looking at
他们偏爱 And do they seem to have a preference
哪个人照顾吗？ for one person over another?
我认为我已经向你们提到过这些 I think I already mentioned this to you
举个例子 But, so, for example
在生命的开端通常被称为A社会阶段 In the very early parts of life, it's called A social stage
也就是说婴儿在某种程度上似乎并不会真的介意 Meaning infants don't still seem to really care
是否有个人在抱着他 one way or another if a human's holding them or not
这时他们的意识还是模糊的一团 You know, there's still kind of this blob sitting there
类似与外界互动这样的能力 Yeah, so, it's not clear that in terms of
还没有发展形成 development of reaching out and things like that hasn't developed
但是很快 一个半月后 But then fairly quickly in the first one and a half months
依恋关系似乎就开始发展了 they do seem to want to, the attachments seem to develop
他们开始和身边的人互动 妈妈爸爸等等 They start reaching for people, mom, dad, whomever
他们渴望与人接触 触摸人体 They want human contact reach human
7到9个月 But then seven to nine months
具体的依恋关系开始一步步形成 specific attachments, meaning, and it starts with one
他们渴望和最初的照顾者建立依恋关系 They want an attachment with its primary caregiver
然后很快这种亲密关系就蔓延到周边的人或物 but then quickly changes to multiple attachments as well
你们会注意到 So that as you start noticing
当某个不熟悉的人抱起 when somebody else picks up little Mickey, that Mickey cries
可能七八个月大的小孩哭了 you know, at maybe 8 months or 7 months, or something like that
通过这个你们就能判断 So that you can kind of tell also
婴儿们有了自己的选择开始认生 there's a preference for somebody over another
但是很快 比如和爸爸呆在一起舒适了 But then quickly, as they get comfortable with dad
当爸爸抱的时候宝宝们也不会哭了 then they don't cry with dad when dad picks him up
然后慢慢适应叔叔婶婶们的怀抱 or when an uncle picks him up, or aunt picks him up
宝宝们有能力形成多重依恋关系 They have the ability to form multiple attachments
和一种安全感 and kind of security. And this maps off
显然我们已经谈论过这点 We're obviously already talked about this
落到具体的依恋关系形成中这是怎么操作的？ What does this map fall into specific attachments?
认知的发展？ Cognitively?
我们讲过这个交叉部分吗？ What did we talk about that this kind of overlaps with?
为什么在这个时候形成了依恋关系？ Why would specific attachment develop at about this time?
学生:(听不清) Student: (INAUDIBLE)
教授:不是认识 是什么呢？ Prof: Well, not to recognize, but what?
记忆的发展 Memory development
尤其是对客观物体存在的永久性的认识 and particularly related to object permanence
比如如果妈妈刚离开了房间 Meaning mom leaves the room
那妈妈还存在吗？ and does she still exist or not ?
所以喜好和偏爱的能力在某种程度上 So the ability to have a preference
依赖于记忆的发展 is kind of dependent on memory to some extent
这就是为什么到了这个时间段 So that's why people think that around that time
具体的依恋关系形成了 specific attachments develop
每一个婴儿都是以同样的方式 Does every infant develop attachments
和照顾者之间形成依恋关系吗？ to a caregiver in the same way?
鲍尔比认为依恋关系是一个普遍的过程 Bowbly says that attachment is a universal process
就像视频里看到的情形 So, like, we saw the videos of free situations
我们讲过 大家也读到 We talked about, you read about
婴儿的不安全型依恋 但这并不妨碍 insecurely attached infants, but, it's worth noting
仍然有依恋关系的存在 that there's still an attachment there
这种情感联结过程仍然存在 the processes of attachment still exist
可能因为母婴关系 遗传历史 It's just that because of relationships and the history
以及宝宝的性情等等 and kind of temperament possibly
依恋关系具体的形成过程可能会有稍许的不同 that these processes developed a little differently
比如视频里我们所称的不安全型依恋 such that we call is insecure
但是通常情况下 But it's still the case that every infant
每个婴儿似乎都以相似的方式 seems to have an attachment built into it
构建起一种依恋关系他们内心都渴望依附 and desires attachments in a similar way
这里还出现了 And we saw the strange situation
一个很奇怪的情形 You read about the strange situation
大家可以看到 you can see the whole thing
在区分安全型依附和不安全型依附 But it has nine different episodes
这些问题上 and the kind of questions that it looks at
有九个不同的片段 in terms of making the distinction between secure and insecure
当妈妈离开房间时 当妈妈又回到房间时 How does the infant react to the caregiver
婴儿会有何反应？ when she leaves? And when she returns?
房间里要是进来一个陌生人他们又有何反应？ How does the infant react to a stranger that's in the room?
婴儿怎样探索他的玩具？ And how much does the infant explore his toys?
基于这些事情就有了一个对应的编码方案 And based on these things, there's a coding scheme
心理学家们用不同的标签 that psychologists use to develop the labels
来区分安全型依附关系或不安全型 people are securely or insecurely attached
如果是不安全型依附的孩子...... and then if they're insecurely attached, what the categories are
比如第一种情况 So, for example
积极探索摆放在房间里的玩具 actively explores when the toys are placed in the room
妈妈的离开会导致不适 Separation is upsetting
如果你们还记得视频里的那个婴儿 If you remember the kid, the infant, in the video you saw
妈妈离开房间两次 the mom left the room twice, and both times
视频里这个孩子的种种表现 and in fact it was a kid
最终会归类为安全型依附关系 that ended up getting securely attached in that category
但是妈妈两次离开都让孩子感到不适 But, both times the kid was upset
第二次离开时他的反应要更加强烈 and, the second time even more so than the first
并不是因为妈妈离开房间的行为 So, it's not that the kids are ambivalent
让孩子感到矛盾 about mom's leaving the room
第二次的强烈反应多半是因为 They are upset
妈妈又回到了这个房间 The differences are more about the mom comes back into the room
随后这个孩子是如何反应的？ how does the kid react to that?
他仍然紧紧缠着妈妈不放还是不再碰她 Does the kid still kind of cling for mom or not reaching for mom
然后似乎得到安慰？ and then seemed soothed by that?
还是变得更加的不依不饶？ Or does the kid become kind of irreconcilable?
在2/3的研究里大多数孩子 Most kids, about 2/3 in different studies
这里不同的研究可能产生的结果数据会稍有不同 Different studies come up with slightly different numbers
大多数一岁大的孩子 but one year old
被归类于安全型依附 most kids being within the categories securely attached
但是这里奇怪的是 当他们两岁时 And the strange situation, you only use up to about 2 years
你们也看过视频 you don't past that
大于两岁时 情况又有不同 there are different things to assess older than two years
维持安全型依附的通常是原来表现焦虑的孩子 Haha. Insecure resistant are the kinds of anxious kids in a sense
他们以妈妈为安全基地慢慢向周围探索玩具 They explore toys relative to the security mom provides
就像妈妈没有离开过 It doesn't seem to leave to them
慢慢融入环境 to kind of like check out things more
第二种情况 妈妈的分开会让孩子非常痛苦 Separation is very distressing
这些孩子伴随着更多的哭喊 You see more crying on average along with kids
当然在这种情况下他们肯定 And they definitely, you know there are
同样希望妈妈回到房间 they want the mom to come back
但是同时他们似乎还反抗妈妈 but they kind of seem to hold it against the mom as well
你们看到的他们同样也爬向妈妈 So you might see crawl enclosure of the mom
但是同时 but at the same time
他们可能不会爬到妈妈身上也得不到安慰 maybe not reaching up or not being soothed at all
这种行为可能有孩子内心所理解的方式 So there's ways in which the kid kind of interpretation
但是一般人们会认为是 but seems, people talk about sometimes
他们在反抗妈妈的拥抱 kids trying to against his mom
至少不易妥协 or at least not reconcilable
只有少数美国的孩子属于这一类 Smaller numbers of American kids fall into this category
我们简要的讲一下这里涉及到的文化差异 I talked about the cultural differences. We talked about that briefly
比如日本社会 Like Japanese society
安全型依附的数量和美国相似 The numbers of secure kids are similar
但是就不安全型依附而言 but in terms of types of insecure
和很多其他亚洲社会的孩子表现一样 the same for kids from Asian societies fall into this category
我们先说到过一种奇怪的情形 And we talked about how in strange situations
尤其是对来自于日本或其它别的社会的孩子 particularly strange for kids from Japan or other societies
那就是第三种分类 回避不安全型依附 it might account for some of that. The avoidant kids
在这类孩子身上表现的更多是情感上的疏远 are kind of just seen as maybe a little more emotionally distant
完全陌生的人进入房间似乎也打扰不了他们 Overall strangers don't seem to bother them
而且当妈妈离开时他们也不紧张痛苦 But, when mom leaves they are not as stressed by that
当妈妈回到房间后 And then when mom comes back
他们可能不会朝着她们爬去 they might not kind of crawl over to her or dad
越来越多的美国孩子也归到了这一类 They get more and more American children fall into this category
在德国东部或北部 and in east Germany or northern Germany
也做过这类研究 studies have been done there
他们的情形也和这种回避不安全型相似 and they are kind of similar to this
事实上 比例比我们还要高 and a little bit higher in fact over there
第四种情况级别最高的混乱型不安全依附 Disorganized attachment is the greatest level
其对应的孩子们一致的表现行为模式 and it doesn't clearly fit a consistent pattern
并不是很清楚 how kids behave
这类不安全依附比例最小 It represents the smallest kind of percentage
一开始并没有这个分类 it didn't initially have this category
是后来添加到依附关系研究中的 It's attachment of adding this research
对于混乱型依附 你们可能听说过 for disorganized attachment. So if you hear about
也可能没听说过 you might always not hear about
我们会讲到 这是最后一个分类 like here we're talking about the fourth category
在很多研究里没有这个分类 There are a lot of studies not included
但是这的确是另外一个类别 But, this is a category
归入这类型的孩子 like in a few situations where the majority of
还是比较少见 kind of physically of this kid fall into this
还有一种观点是 The other idea is the kid doesn't know
孩子不知道该如何应对这些情绪干扰事件 how to respond to these events, these emotionally upsetting events
依附模式是既爱又恐惧 The attachment figure is both loved and feared at the same time
思想和行为都冻结了 So that, it kind of unsure of what to do
所以不知道该如何应对 when it says maybe freeze
这就是这类你们读到的依附模式 So these attachment styles, you read about
我会给你们简要的描述一下 and I just kind of gave you a quick description of them too
你们认为这种模式是怎样形成的呢？ Where do you think they come from?
相对于安全型依附如果一个孩子表现出 If a kid is insecure resistant or insecure ambivalent
反抗型不安全依附或是矛盾型不安全依附 versus a securely attached kid
这种模式是怎么形成的？ where does that come from?
是由于父母平时养育的方式不当？ Is that from the way the parent has handled the kid?
又或是孩子本身的性情使然？ Or is that maybe something about the child's temperament?
我想给你们展示一个在荷兰完成的 I wanted to present a study that kind of shows that
相关的研究 It was done in the Netherlands
这个研究被很多依附关系研究者引用 It is cited a lot by attachment researchers
这个研究发现父母的养育模式至关重要 for the idea that parenting is critical
在心理学上有很多 A lot of people, like in psychology
研究父母的养育方法的和研究孩子性情的 there's kind of parent researchers and temperament researchers
某些性情研究者认为 and sometimes the temperament researchers
不是很多 某些人认为 kind of, well, not most of, sometimes they say things like
是孩子的性情推动这种模式的形成 they think temperament drives these type of things
而不是父母的养育方法 more than parenting does
而这个研究却另辟蹊径 But this study does a pretty good job
它认为家庭养育很重要 showing that family matters
但是孩子的性情也有影响 but it also shows that temperament matters as well
很多被鉴定为性情原因的孩子 At risk infants who are identified based on their temperament
大多是来自于低收入家庭 and these are all from lower income families as well
即是所谓的社会经济地位的影响 That's what SES means. Socioeconomic status
来自于低收入家庭的孩子 Socioeconomic status for lower income
在两周时 他们被鉴定出焦躁 Infants were identified as irritable at two weeks
也就是他们很容易被其他事情分散注意力 Meaning they were more easily distracted by these kind of things
我们可以做一个小测试 Anyways, we can do a little test to see how reactive a kid
看看他们会如何反应 is to the kind of things that happen
这个代表着孩子的急躁程度 and that's a proxy for how irritable the kid is
这个测试是婴儿刚出生不久时做的 So that was identified very early in the kids life
在这些孩子6个月大时 But those kids at 6 months
一个心理学家 this was an intervention with a psychologist
进行了适当的干预 in the proper psychology
一半孩子的父母进行了干预 Half of them had an intervention with parents
另一半则没有 and the other half did not
待会儿我会告诉你们结果 And, well, I'll tell you in a second
这类心理干预 but that intervention was about a kind of
实际就是负责识别孩子所需 being responsible to identifying the kids needs
大家知道当孩子哭喊时可能是过度刺激 you know, when a kid was crying or was maybe over stimulated
还有当他们欢笑时等等 种种表现 what they had to identify that and then how to respond to that
父母要做的就是识别出背后的意图 in terms of kind of smiling at the kid more often
然后找出应对的方法 and things like that
九个月后没获得干预的小组也没发生变化 Well, at nine months as if nothing happened
还是只有28%的孩子被确认为是安全型依附 only 28% of the kids were securely attached
这实际上 大家可能不知道 So this actually kind of, well, you don't know exactly
这个数字还是 but in that 28% is obviously less than the numbers
明显小于美国孩子 I put up for American kids
事实上荷兰孩子 and that would be true for Netherlands kids
安全型依附的比例算高的了 what percentage are more securely attached
这个实验结果让你们会认为 So you could look at that and say
可能性情并没有造成多大的影响 oh, maybe temperament does make some difference
这些孩子身上不同寻常的性情 if nothing with that kind of normal development occurs
如果没有正常发展 with this kid with the unusual temperament
他们中的大多数都不会是安全型依附 most of them won't be securely attached
尽管不知道父母们具体是怎么操作的 Although you don't know what the parents do in that case
但是就那些参与了这类心理干预的而言 But, of the ones who got this intervention
9个月时62%的孩子被确认为是安全型依附 62% were securely attached at 9 months
28%对比62% 是个不小的差距 So 28% versus 62% is what a difference
有多于1/3的孩子 of 34% You know, so a 1/3 more kids
如果对父母的养育方式进行干预 were securely attached at 9 months
在9个月时被确认为安全型依附 if they got this parenting intervention
这就明确说明了养育手段的作用 So, it definitely shows that parenting makes a difference
对父母的养育技巧进行培训是有影响的 and that training in parenting skills can make a difference
同时干预的和未参与干预的父母 At the same time
两边都不可能做到100% it's not 100% And that could either be
可能一些父母并没有学会这位心理学家 well, maybe some of the parents didn't actually learn the skills
试图教给他们的干预技巧 that the psychologist was trying to train them
又或是一些孩子 Or, maybe there is that temperament
本性急躁 maybe that irritable temperament
总之要成为理想的父母是很困难的 Maybe it's really difficult to be an exceptional parent
即使我们经过刻意的培训 even we get training, to kind of develop
发展父母儿女之间的这种依附关系 that attachment relationship
参与干预的这组发现如果妈妈 Also found that moms
有一个积极的态度经常对着孩子微笑 with a positive view of kind of smiling more at the kids
积极的响应孩子们的需要 responding more sensitively to things
孩子们举止会更加友善更加合群 infants were more sociable and kind of
当你把玩具摆出来 when you put toys out
或者让他和其它的孩子一起玩耍时 or put more with other infants
他们会更加积极主动的去探索 and other caregivers to explore more